Quote

Grandparenthood is one of life's rewards for surviving your own children.

Erma Bombeck

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Erma Bombeck
Age: 69 †
Born: 1927
Born: February 21
Died: 1996
Died: April 22
Column Author
Journalist
Writer
Bellbrook
Ohio
Erma Louise Bombeck
Surviving
Rewards
Children
Life

More quotes by Erma Bombeck

Image
If you can't make it better, you can laugh at it.
Erma Bombeck
Image
I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.
Erma Bombeck
Image
A member of the committee slapped a name tag over my left bosom. What shall we name the other one? I smiled. She was not amused.
Erma Bombeck
Image
Some say our national pastime is baseball. Not me. It's gossip.
Erma Bombeck
Image
How come anything you buy will go on sale next week?
Erma Bombeck
Image
I read one psychologist's theory that said, Never strike a child in your anger. When could I strike him? When he is kissing me on my birthday? When he's recuperating from measles? Do I slap the Bible out of his hand on Sunday?
Erma Bombeck
Image
If compliments were food, I'd have starved to death 28 years ago.
Erma Bombeck
Image
Early in my life I had made a pact with myself. I would never eat anything that moved when I cooked it, excited the dog, or inflated upon impact with my teeth.
Erma Bombeck
Image
I was leafing through a magazine where there was a before-and-after picture of a woman who went from a size 5 to a size 3 by liposuction. Was she serious? I've cooked bigger turkeys than her before picture.
Erma Bombeck
Image
You show me a boy who brings a snake home to his mother and I'll show you an orphan.
Erma Bombeck
Image
not all bears have their own television series. Some of them are unemployed wild animals.
Erma Bombeck
Image
Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery.
Erma Bombeck
Image
I do not participate in any sport with ambulances at the bottom of the hill.
Erma Bombeck
Image
Remember, you can lead a fifty-seven-year-old body to motherhood, but you can't make it stay awake.
Erma Bombeck
Image
Maybe you know why a child can reject a hot dog with mustard served on a soft bun at home, yet eat six of them two hours later at fifty cents each.
Erma Bombeck
Image
Enter my first neighbor - a woman who spoke in complete, coherent sentences, who ate with a knife and fork and who only cried at weddings. I couldn't help myself. In a dramatic gesture, I bolted the door and threw my body across it to prevent her exit. She understood.
Erma Bombeck
Image
Volunteers are the only human beings on the face of the earth who reflect this nation's compassion, unselfish caring, patience, and just plain love for one another.
Erma Bombeck
Image
Kids are without a doubt the most suspicious diners in the world. They will eat mud (raw or baked) rocks, paste, crayons, ball-point pens, moving goldfish, cigarette butts, and cat food. Try to coax a little beef stew into their mouths and they look at you like a puppy when you stand over him with the Sunday paper rolled up.
Erma Bombeck
Image
There's nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child.
Erma Bombeck
Image
I have a friend who lives by a three-word philosophy: Seize the Moment. Just possibly, she may be the wisest woman on this planet.
Erma Bombeck