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Grandparenthood is one of life's rewards for surviving your own children.

Erma Bombeck

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Erma Bombeck
Age: 69 †
Born: 1927
Born: February 21
Died: 1996
Died: April 22
Column Author
Journalist
Writer
Bellbrook
Ohio
Erma Louise Bombeck
Surviving
Rewards
Children
Life

More quotes by Erma Bombeck

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I have always felt that too much time was given before the birth, which is spent learning things like how to breathe in and out with your husband (I had my baby when they gave you a shot in the hip and you didn't wake up until the kid was ready to start school), and not enough time given to how to mother after the baby is born.
Erma Bombeck
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She's as funny as a toothache
Erma Bombeck
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Family life got better and we got our car back - as soon as we put 'I love Mom' on the license plate.
Erma Bombeck
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Most women put off entertaining until the kids are grown.
Erma Bombeck
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What we're really talking about is a wonderful day set aside on the fourth Thursday of November when no one diets. I mean, why else would they call it Thanksgiving?
Erma Bombeck
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A grandparent will accept your calls from anywhere, collect.
Erma Bombeck
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Maybe age is kinder to us than we think. With my bad eyes, I can't see how bad I look, and with my rotten memory, I have a good excuse for getting out of a lot of stuff.
Erma Bombeck
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You become about as exciting as your food blender. The kids come in, look you in the eye, and ask if anybody's home.
Erma Bombeck
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Somewhere it is written that parents who are critical of other people's children and publicly admit they can do better are asking for it.
Erma Bombeck
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Like religion, politics, and family planning, cereal is not a topic to be brought up in public. It's too controversial.
Erma Bombeck
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When it comes to cooking, five years ago I felt guilty just adding water. Now I want to bang the tube against the countertop and have a five-course meal pop out. If it comes with plastic silverware and a plate that self-destructs, all the better.
Erma Bombeck
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Never order food in excess of your body weight.
Erma Bombeck
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I didn't fear old age. I was just becoming increasingly aware of the fact that the only people who said old age was beautiful were usually twenty-three years old.
Erma Bombeck
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No One Diets on Thanksgiving.
Erma Bombeck
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For years, my husband and I have advocated separate vacations. But the kids keep finding us.
Erma Bombeck
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Kids need love the most when they're acting most unlovable.
Erma Bombeck
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My mother phones daily to ask, Did you just try to reach me? When I reply no, she adds, So, if you're not too busy, call me while I'm still alive, . . . and hangs up.
Erma Bombeck
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I originate from a family where sauce is viewed as a refreshment.
Erma Bombeck
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Adults can take a simple holiday for Children and screw it up. What began as a presentation of simple gifts to delight and surprise children around the Christmas tree has culminated in a woman unwrapping six shrimp forks from her dog, who drew her name.
Erma Bombeck
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I lost everything in the post-natal depression.
Erma Bombeck