Quote

Giving birth is little more than a set of muscular contractions granting passage of a child. Then the mother is born.

Erma Bombeck

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Erma Bombeck
Age: 69 †
Born: 1927
Born: February 21
Died: 1996
Died: April 22
Column Author
Journalist
Writer
Bellbrook
Ohio
Erma Louise Bombeck
Born
Mother
Contractions
Littles
Granting
Little
Muscular
Giving
Passage
Children
Passages
Birth
Child

More quotes by Erma Bombeck

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The more I think about it, the more there is to be said for the sloth. He sleeps fifteen to eighteen hours a day and is known to have taken forty-eight days to travel four miles. He hangs in the trees after he's dead. But he lives longer than the cheetah.
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The grass is always greener over the septic tank.
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When you're lecturing teenagers and they begin to hum and leave the room, you can sense there is hostility.
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Don't worry about who doesn't like you, who has more, or who's doing what.
Erma Bombeck
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You have to love a nation that celebrates its independence every July 4, not with a parade of guns, tanks, and soldiers who file by the White House in a show of strength and muscle, but with family picnics where kids throw Frisbees, the potato salad gets iffy, and the flies die from happiness. You may think you have overeaten, but it is patriotism.
Erma Bombeck
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Kids need love the most when they're acting most unlovable.
Erma Bombeck
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It takes an uncommon amount of guts to put your dreams on the line.
Erma Bombeck
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Those magazine dieting stories always have the testimonial of a woman who wore a dress that could slipcover New Jersey in one photo and thirty days later looked like a well-dressed thermometer.
Erma Bombeck
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I do not participate in any sport with ambulances at the bottom of the hill.
Erma Bombeck
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One meal a day is enough for a lion and would be for all of us if all we did all day was swat flies.
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I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained, or the sofa faded.
Erma Bombeck
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Grandparenthood is one of life's rewards for surviving your own children.
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House guests should be regarded as perishables: Leave them out too long and they go bad.
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When the history of guilt is written, parents who refuse their children money will be right up there in the Top Ten.
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I take a very practical view of raising children. I put a sign in each of their rooms: 'Checkout Time is 18 years.'
Erma Bombeck
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I was too old for a paper route, too young for Social Security and too tired for an affair.
Erma Bombeck
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I used everything you gave me.
Erma Bombeck
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Don't confuse fame with success. Madonna is one Helen Keller is the other.
Erma Bombeck
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One son appears in stereo - a transistor in one ear and the phone in the other.
Erma Bombeck
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Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery.
Erma Bombeck