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I will buy any creme, cosmetic, or elixir from a woman with a European accent.

Erma Bombeck

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Erma Bombeck
Age: 69 †
Born: 1927
Born: February 21
Died: 1996
Died: April 22
Column Author
Journalist
Writer
Bellbrook
Ohio
Erma Louise Bombeck
Accent
Accents
European
Europe
Literature
Creme
Woman
Cosmetic
Elixir
Cosmetics

More quotes by Erma Bombeck

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Never go to your high school reunion pregnant or they will think that is all you have done since you graduated.
Erma Bombeck
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I have never understood, for example, how come a child can climb up on the roof, scale the TV antenna, and rescue the cat ... yet cannot walk down the hallway without grabbing both walls with his grubby hands for balance.
Erma Bombeck
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One son appears in stereo - a transistor in one ear and the phone in the other.
Erma Bombeck
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On vacations: We hit the sunny beaches where we occupy ourselves keeping the sun off our skin, the saltwater off our bodies, and the sand out of our belongings.
Erma Bombeck
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A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.
Erma Bombeck
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Like religion, politics, and family planning, cereal is not a topic to be brought up in public. It's too controversial.
Erma Bombeck
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Having a delivery covered by Medicare just isn't going to fly. It's too risky for a woman to put a baby down and not remember where she left it.
Erma Bombeck
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You have to love a nation that celebrates its independence every July 4, not with a parade of guns, tanks, and soldiers who file by the White House in a show of strength and muscle, but with family picnics where kids throw Frisbees, the potato salad gets iffy, and the flies die from happiness. You may think you have overeaten, but it is patriotism.
Erma Bombeck
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Let us hope manufacturers can come up with a diaper that is environmentally sound. To go back to cloth would send us back to the day when breathing and raising a baby at the same time were incompatible.
Erma Bombeck
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It is not until you become a mother that your judgment slowly turns to compassion and understanding.
Erma Bombeck
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I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained, or the sofa faded.
Erma Bombeck
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Family life got better and we got our car back - as soon as we put 'I love Mom' on the license plate.
Erma Bombeck
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A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend - and he's a priest.
Erma Bombeck
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Myths that need clarification: No matter how many times you see the Grand canyon, you are still emotionally moved to tears. False. It depends on how many children the out-of-towners brought with them who kicked the back of your seat from Phoenix to Flagstaff and got their gum caught in your hair.
Erma Bombeck
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Don't worry about who doesn't like you, who has more, or who's doing what.
Erma Bombeck
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Our teen-agers withdrew to their bedrooms on their thirteenth birthday and didn't show themselves to us again until it was time to get married.
Erma Bombeck
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I convinced him his luggage had gone to that big Bermuda Triangle in the sky.
Erma Bombeck
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Know the difference between success and fame. Success is Mother Teresa. Fame is Madonna.
Erma Bombeck
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Who in their infinite wisdom decreed that Little League uniforms be white? Certainly not a mother.
Erma Bombeck
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Encourage independence in your children by regularly losing them in the supermarket.
Erma Bombeck