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'Insanity... I like it.

Eoin Colfer

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Eoin Colfer
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: May 14
Author
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Wexford
Insanity
Life
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More quotes by Eoin Colfer

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Sometimes plans don't translate smoothly from paper to real life.
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My bugs don't have bugs.
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Look at those two. Wasting time. You wouldn't catch me doing that.
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Humm humm haaa. Rahmumm humm haaaa, intoned Opal, finishing her chant. Peace be inside me, tolerance all around me, forgiveness in my path. Now, Mervall, show me where the filthy human is so that I may feed him his organs.
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The humans were protecting their heritage, or so they thought. Strange that Mud Men seem more concerned about the past than the present.
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The next minute or so was spent howling on the ceiling . Imp No.1 joined in, but he wasn't really feeling it. It shouldn't be Who do we hate?, he thought, it really should be whom, but this probably wasn't a good time to bring that up.
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No matter what dimension you're in, there's a big-headed male trying to take over the world.
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I can't imagine what they're planning. But I can tell you two things. We won't like it, and it won't be legal.
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Knock yourself out... Or rather, don't.
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(about his terrible attempt at making a sandwich) It's more difficult than it looks. (Artemis Fowl)
Eoin Colfer
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Wait, said Butler. Just wait, Holly. Artemis has a plan. He squinted through the green dome. What is your plan, Artemis? All Artemis could do was smile and shrug.
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We lost the crickets, she said. Even you can't make that sound tough. ...I am Butler, he said with a straight-face. Everything I say sounds tough. Now, get out of the lake, fairy.
Eoin Colfer
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No alcohol, Riley. She nodded at the screen. How are you liking the twenty-first century? Riley burped. The Take That are most melodic. And God bless Harry Potter is all I can say. If not for him, all of London would have been consumed by the dark arts.
Eoin Colfer
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I am not exuding anything, said Holly through gritted teeth. Orion tapped her shoulder. I beg to differ. You're exuding right now, a wonderful aura. It's pastel blue with little dolphins.
Eoin Colfer
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Artemis ducked. Cudgeon didn't. Guess what? Artemis was smarter.
Eoin Colfer
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That was all he said, except for Aaaeerrgghhh. Which is not really a word. But the reason that he screamed Aaaeerrgghhh was that Franco had bitten him savegly on the wrist.
Eoin Colfer
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Her glare was so intense that you completely forgot she was wearing pink.
Eoin Colfer
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If Koboi defeats and presumably murders us both then you can consider the debt null and void.
Eoin Colfer
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Well, I don't like the first bit and I don't know the last bit. So I'm really hoping the middle bit is exceptional.
Eoin Colfer
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When the moment comes, will you take your chance to be a hero?
Eoin Colfer