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There is always a use for everything, Victor had told him. Even pain.

Eoin Colfer

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Eoin Colfer
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: May 14
Author
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Wexford
Use
Everything
Even
Always
Victor
Told
Pain

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Doobie always wanted to see the badge. It was shiny, and he was eight.
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Artemis turned and stared at his friend with the blue eyes. Holly was staring back, and she was smiling. “I remember,” she said aloud. “You saved me.” Artemis smiled back. “It never happened,” he said.
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Listen to me, goblin. You're stupid, let's accept that and move on.
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And it's amazing how much noise people ignoring each other can make.
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There’s always time for babbling.
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I don't suppose you would consider peaceful surrender?
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Trust me. I'm a genius.
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It would take less than a second for you to die. But that's quite long enough to be in mortal agony, don't you think?
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I am not exuding anything, said Holly through gritted teeth. Orion tapped her shoulder. I beg to differ. You're exuding right now, a wonderful aura. It's pastel blue with little dolphins.
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Me, Artemis blurted. I'm the nut. Artemis could have sworn the squid winked at him before bringing the five-ton chunk of spacecraft swinging down toward the morsel of meat in its blue shell. I'm the nut! Artemis shouted again, a little hysterically, it must be said.
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A genius. A criminal mastermind. A millionaire. And he is only twelve years old.
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Hey, look your girlfriend is saying something. Artemis had a vast mental reserve of scathing comebacks at his disposal, but none of them covered girlfriend insults. He wasn't even sure if it was an insult. And if it was, who was being insulted? Him or the girl?
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Everything rests on the poisoned wine. If it were just the queen, I could force it down her gullet, but Declan Broekhart would run me through with that damned ceremonial sword, and if his wife's stares were daggers, he'd be dead already.
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It'll be messy, but after a day you'll be zipping around as though you were a thousand years old again.
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Being in command means making tough decisions. Not being in command means shutting up and doing what you're told. --Artemis Fowl
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Look at those two. Wasting time. You wouldn't catch me doing that.
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A CD. How quaint. We have these in museums.
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My truffles? You took them? That's just mean!
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Ignorance, as they say, is usually fatal, but sometimes it can be bliss.
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Artemis: I am not buoyed by that. Foaly: You are not supposed to be buoyed by that. You are supposed to be equalized. Mulch: I'm pretty sure that both of you just made really horrible jokes. But I'm not sure because I think you broke my funny bone.
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