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Control puberty? snorted the bodyguard.If you manage that, you'll be the first.

Eoin Colfer

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Eoin Colfer
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: May 14
Author
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Wexford
First
Snorted
Bodyguard
Puberty
Manage
Control
Firsts

More quotes by Eoin Colfer

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Connor Broekhart was born to fly, or more accurately he was born flying.
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Holly walked rapidly into the cockpit, strapping herself into the pilot's chair. Seven and a half hours to save the world. Isn’t there some law that says we get at least twenty-four? Artemis strapped himself into the co-pilot's chair. I don't think Opal bothers with laws.
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Yes. Because every family needs a laser for thier family jet.
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Ah, my princess. Noble steed. How does the morning find you both?
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People like me, LB, the truly great ones ... we are always alone.
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What's that supposed to mean? A wolf's head on a stick. Big wolf barbecue tonight? Bring your own wolf?
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How was your... eh... trip? Artemis felt the sting of tears in his own eyes. Um, eventful.
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You wouldn't know a clue if it danced in front of you with a T-Shirt that read 'I'm a clue
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I'm LEP. A captain. No rent-a-cop gnome is going to stand in the way of my orders.
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There will be consequences for this, he thought. You can't alter time and not be affected. But whatever the consequences are, I will bear them, because the alternative is too terrible. -Artemis Fowl, The Lost Colony
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Is that how you're going to take me? Scare me into voluntarily coming aboard, then steal my Ice Cube? It's always cubes with you, noted Foaly, somewhat randomly. What's wrong with a nice sphere?
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Butler could kill you a hundred different ways without use of his armoury. Though I'm sure one would be quite sufficient.
Eoin Colfer
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Meg and Belch only had eyes for each other. Not in the usual romantic sense.
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I have no time for babbling foolishness.” “Don’t be so hasty,” said Victor. “There’s always time for babbling.
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A monkey glances up and sees a banana, and that's as far as he looks. A visionary looks up and sees the moon.
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HOLLY: Are you suggesting I occasionally stray from the rule book? FOALY: No. I'm suggesting you do not own a copy of the rule book, and if you do, you have certainly never opened it.
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There’s always time for babbling.
Eoin Colfer
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Im riding a troll! i was born to do this,and steal stuff, and EAT LOADS!
Eoin Colfer
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Everything rests on the poisoned wine. If it were just the queen, I could force it down her gullet, but Declan Broekhart would run me through with that damned ceremonial sword, and if his wife's stares were daggers, he'd be dead already.
Eoin Colfer
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Have you ever heard of the theory of relativity? Artemis blinked. Is this a joke? I have traveled through time, Doctor. I think I know a little something about relativity.
Eoin Colfer