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Chief of security : They have a tank! How did they get a tank up here?

Eoin Colfer

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Eoin Colfer
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: May 14
Author
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Wexford
Tanks
Chief
Chiefs
Security
Tank

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A genius. A criminal mastermind. A millionaire. And he is only twelve years old.
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Everything rests on the poisoned wine. If it were just the queen, I could force it down her gullet, but Declan Broekhart would run me through with that damned ceremonial sword, and if his wife's stares were daggers, he'd be dead already.
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The sarcasm made a slight whistling noise as it flew over Loafers' head.
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Yes. Because every family needs a laser for thier family jet.
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Well, I don't like the first bit and I don't know the last bit. So I'm really hoping the middle bit is exceptional.
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You know you're in trouble when your own imagination starts punishing you.
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(text message) CMDR ROOT. TRBLE BELOW. HAVN OVRRN BY GOBLINS. PLCE PLAZA SRROUNDED. CUDGEON + OPL KBOI BHND PLOT. NO WPONS OR CMMUNICATIONS. DNA CNONS CNTRLLED BY KBOI. I M TRPPED IN OP BTH. CNCL THNKS IM 2 BLM. IF ALIVE PLSE HLP. IF NOT, WRNG NMBR.
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Are you saying that you people knew about these amorophobots all the time? Of course we did. They attacked us in Iceland. Remember? No. I was unconscious.
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Miss me? Bet you did ... so would I.
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I wear a name tag to help people find me. It saves time when you're dealing with idiots.
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She forces me to endure this ridiculous therapy, when the so-called counselors are little better than misguided do-gooders with degrees. -Artemis Fowl
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Artemis: How long will it take you to prepare the time spell? N1 chewed his knuckle: About as long as it takes you to take your clothes off. Aaarrk, Artemis half choked.
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A pity to survive night flights over St. Georges Channel only to crack my skull falling from a ladder.
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A metaphorical weight lifted from his allegorical chest and Artemis Fowl felt himself again.
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Just what we need, moaned Holly. Artemis Fowl with magical powers.
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As a child, Zaphod had been diagnosed with ADHDDAAADHD (ntm) ABT which stood for Always Dreaming His Dopey Days Away, Also Attention Deficit Hyperflactulance Disorder (not to mention) A Bit Thick.
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I don't like lollipops.
Eoin Colfer
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(about his terrible attempt at making a sandwich) It's more difficult than it looks. (Artemis Fowl)
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Is that how you're going to take me? Scare me into voluntarily coming aboard, then steal my Ice Cube? It's always cubes with you, noted Foaly, somewhat randomly. What's wrong with a nice sphere?
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I am unarmed. But Butler here, my ...ah...butler, has a Sig Saucer in his shoulder holster, two shrike-throwing knives in his boots, aderringer two-shot up his sleeve, garrotte wire in his watch, and three stun greanades concealed in variouse pockets. Anything else, Butler?
Eoin Colfer