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Nobody's death is impending. ...Well technically everyone's death is impending.

Eoin Colfer

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Eoin Colfer
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: May 14
Author
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Wexford
Everyone
Death
Wells
Well
Impending
Technically
Nobody

More quotes by Eoin Colfer

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Don't you worry about that, Mr. Adamsson. Why don't you head back to Reykjavik and spend some of that extortionate fee you charged me for a couple of hours' usage of your frankly third-rate restaurant and perhaps find a friendless tree stump to listen to your woes?
Eoin Colfer
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Remember this? You gave it to me for ensuring your trigger finger got reattached to your hand. You said it would remind me of that spark of decency inside me. I'm trying to do something decent now, Captain.
Eoin Colfer
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Maybe I’ll keep you.” Abbot chuckled and prodded Artemis’s back with his sword. “It’d be nice to have a pet human around. I could teach you tricks.” “I have a trick for you,” said Artemis, and he fired a single blast from the gun.
Eoin Colfer
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Don't hate me forever, Arty, whispered Holly. I couldn't bear that.
Eoin Colfer
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If you were me, then I'd be you, and if I were you, then I'd hide somewhere far away.
Eoin Colfer
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Dreams come true all the time, just not for the dreamers
Eoin Colfer
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Onscreen, Foaly rubbed his eyelids with his index fingers. Yeah, yeah. Here we go. Captain Short goes rogue once more. Hands up who's surprised. Anyone?
Eoin Colfer
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Anything else, Butler? The cosh, sir.
Eoin Colfer
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I never tell anyone exactly how clever I am. They would be too scared.
Eoin Colfer
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The humans were protecting their heritage, or so they thought. Strange that Mud Men seem more concerned about the past than the present.
Eoin Colfer
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Benny was awake again. Happened every morning.
Eoin Colfer
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Now before we get into anything, ladies, no scratching, no spitting and no tattling to mummy.
Eoin Colfer
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(text message) CMDR ROOT. TRBLE BELOW. HAVN OVRRN BY GOBLINS. PLCE PLAZA SRROUNDED. CUDGEON + OPL KBOI BHND PLOT. NO WPONS OR CMMUNICATIONS. DNA CNONS CNTRLLED BY KBOI. I M TRPPED IN OP BTH. CNCL THNKS IM 2 BLM. IF ALIVE PLSE HLP. IF NOT, WRNG NMBR.
Eoin Colfer
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A pity to survive night flights over St. Georges Channel only to crack my skull falling from a ladder.
Eoin Colfer
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Vinyaya was being openly antagonistic, and that was an emotion that could be trusted, unless of course it was a bluff and the commander was a secret fan of his, unless it was a double bluff and she really did feel antagonistic.
Eoin Colfer
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Look at those two. Wasting time. You wouldn't catch me doing that.
Eoin Colfer
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I waved my hand in front of my face, obi-wan style. I am not here. Niall's mucas glands kicked into overdrive. Eoin's dead! And his ghost is standing right there on the grass! Donal let out a long suffering sigh. Eoin is being a writer. Niall calmed down, becuase everyone knows writers are weird and are always doing stupid thingss.
Eoin Colfer
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What's that supposed to mean? A wolf's head on a stick. Big wolf barbecue tonight? Bring your own wolf?
Eoin Colfer
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I'm right there with you, darlin'. Unless you step on a landmine, in which case I'm way back in the Operations Room.
Eoin Colfer
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Have you ever heard of the theory of relativity? Artemis blinked. Is this a joke? I have traveled through time, Doctor. I think I know a little something about relativity.
Eoin Colfer