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A genius. A criminal mastermind. A millionaire. And he is only twelve years old.

Eoin Colfer

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Eoin Colfer
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: May 14
Author
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Wexford
Criminals
Genius
Years
Mastermind
Millionaire
Criminal
Twelve

More quotes by Eoin Colfer

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She forces me to endure this ridiculous therapy, when the so-called counselors are little better than misguided do-gooders with degrees. -Artemis Fowl
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I am perhaps unusual in that I came to 'Doctor Who' through the numerous novelisations and not through the television show.
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Victor Vigny: It is like the old fairy tale. The boy saves the princess they fall in love. He invents a flying machine - along with his dashing teacher, of course. They get married and name thier firstborn after the aforementioned dashing teacher. Conor: I don't recall that fairy tale from the nursery. Victor Vigny: Trust me, It's a classic.
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Yes. Because every family needs a laser for thier family jet.
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As a child, Zaphod had been diagnosed with ADHDDAAADHD (ntm) ABT which stood for Always Dreaming His Dopey Days Away, Also Attention Deficit Hyperflactulance Disorder (not to mention) A Bit Thick.
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Everything rests on the poisoned wine. If it were just the queen, I could force it down her gullet, but Declan Broekhart would run me through with that damned ceremonial sword, and if his wife's stares were daggers, he'd be dead already.
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My truffles? You took them? That's just mean!
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Foaly: Anyone see you come in here? Holly: The FBI, CIA, NSA, DEA, MI6. Oh, and the EIB. Foaly: The EIB? Holly: (smirking) Everyone in the building.
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That was all he said, except for Aaaeerrgghhh. Which is not really a word. But the reason that he screamed Aaaeerrgghhh was that Franco had bitten him savegly on the wrist.
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Maybe I’ll keep you.” Abbot chuckled and prodded Artemis’s back with his sword. “It’d be nice to have a pet human around. I could teach you tricks.” “I have a trick for you,” said Artemis, and he fired a single blast from the gun.
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Miss me? Bet you did ... so would I.
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When you've come face-to-face with the dark side of the school yard, life doesn't hold many surprises.
Eoin Colfer
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Knock yourself out... Or rather, don't.
Eoin Colfer
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I am charging you with the protection of my mother and friends, not to mention keeping my younger self off the Internet. He is as dangerous as Opal.
Eoin Colfer
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This was a nightmare scenario for any bodyguard: stuck in the middle of a transparent tube, several miles underwater, with a murdering band of fugitives at one end and an enthralled but still highly skilled police officer at the other.
Eoin Colfer
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Commander: What's that? Foaly: It's a finger, what does look like?
Eoin Colfer
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The sarcasm made a slight whistling noise as it flew over Loafers' head.
Eoin Colfer
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A pity to survive night flights over St. Georges Channel only to crack my skull falling from a ladder.
Eoin Colfer
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The two of them went down in a heap, with not even a turkey to break their fall.
Eoin Colfer
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Let us proceed under the assumption that the fairy folk do exist, and that I am not a gibbering moron.
Eoin Colfer