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I wear a name tag to help people find me. It saves time when you're dealing with idiots.

Eoin Colfer

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Eoin Colfer
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: May 14
Author
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Wexford
Time
Dealing
People
Idiot
Wear
Name
Names
Help
Tag
Helping
Idiots
Find
Saves

More quotes by Eoin Colfer

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Don't try to understand me, just be grateful that you felt the warmth of Zaphod Beeblebrox's aura on your wonderstruck face.
Eoin Colfer
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There will be consequences for this, he thought. You can't alter time and not be affected. But whatever the consequences are, I will bear them, because the alternative is too terrible. -Artemis Fowl, The Lost Colony
Eoin Colfer
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Vinyaya was being openly antagonistic, and that was an emotion that could be trusted, unless of course it was a bluff and the commander was a secret fan of his, unless it was a double bluff and she really did feel antagonistic.
Eoin Colfer
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'Insanity... I like it.
Eoin Colfer
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When the moment comes, will you take your chance to be a hero?
Eoin Colfer
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Benny was awake again. Happened every morning.
Eoin Colfer
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Remember this? You gave it to me for ensuring your trigger finger got reattached to your hand. You said it would remind me of that spark of decency inside me. I'm trying to do something decent now, Captain.
Eoin Colfer
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Of course I saved you, she said. I couldn't do without you. And because she was happy and flushed with magic Holly leaned down and kissed Artemis, magic sparking around the contact like tiny fireworks.
Eoin Colfer
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And it's amazing how much noise people ignoring each other can make.
Eoin Colfer
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Hit that back-stabber where it hurts, right in the ambition.
Eoin Colfer
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She forces me to endure this ridiculous therapy, when the so-called counselors are little better than misguided do-gooders with degrees. -Artemis Fowl
Eoin Colfer
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Are you saying that you people knew about these amorophobots all the time? Of course we did. They attacked us in Iceland. Remember? No. I was unconscious.
Eoin Colfer
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Let's save some time here. I grow weary of your clumsy bluffs. In the case of an abduction, the LEP will send a crack Retrieval team to get back what has been lost.. You have done so. Excuse me while I titter. Crack team? Honestly. A Cub-Scout patrol armed with water pistols could have defeated them.
Eoin Colfer
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The miracle of modern science. The LEP pours millions into your department, Foaly, and all you can do is send Mud Boys to the toilet.
Eoin Colfer
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HOLLY: Are you suggesting I occasionally stray from the rule book? FOALY: No. I'm suggesting you do not own a copy of the rule book, and if you do, you have certainly never opened it.
Eoin Colfer
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My bugs don't have bugs.
Eoin Colfer
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Trust me. I'm a genius.
Eoin Colfer
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gold is power-artemis fowl I liked the artemis fowl series because its about a boy genius
Eoin Colfer
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Sometimes plans don't translate smoothly from paper to real life.
Eoin Colfer
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Hilarious, dude. You should, like, have your own show.
Eoin Colfer