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Don’t feel bad I regularly reduce people to unintelligible stammers.

Eoin Colfer

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Eoin Colfer
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: May 14
Author
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Wexford
Feels
People
Unintelligible
Regularly
Reduce
Feel

More quotes by Eoin Colfer

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Mulch's tongue lolled out, resting on the centaur's neck. Mmm, he mumbled around his tongue. Horse. Tasty Let's go, said Foaly nervously. Let's go right now.
Eoin Colfer
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I bet, said Mulch, that you would set the world on fire just to watch it burn. Opal tapped the suggestion into a small electronic notepad on her pocket computer. Thanks for that. Now, tell me everything.
Eoin Colfer
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Look at those two. Wasting time. You wouldn't catch me doing that.
Eoin Colfer
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Don't you worry about that, Mr. Adamsson. Why don't you head back to Reykjavik and spend some of that extortionate fee you charged me for a couple of hours' usage of your frankly third-rate restaurant and perhaps find a friendless tree stump to listen to your woes?
Eoin Colfer
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Anything else, Butler? The cosh, sir.
Eoin Colfer
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Who or what inspires you? I must admit that I often read my own articles in scientific journals and inspire myself.
Eoin Colfer
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Artemis: I am not buoyed by that. Foaly: You are not supposed to be buoyed by that. You are supposed to be equalized. Mulch: I'm pretty sure that both of you just made really horrible jokes. But I'm not sure because I think you broke my funny bone.
Eoin Colfer
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I am unarmed. But Butler here, my ...ah...butler, has a Sig Saucer in his shoulder holster, two shrike-throwing knives in his boots, aderringer two-shot up his sleeve, garrotte wire in his watch, and three stun greanades concealed in variouse pockets. Anything else, Butler?
Eoin Colfer
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The miracle of modern science. The LEP pours millions into your department, Foaly, and all you can do is send Mud Boys to the toilet.
Eoin Colfer
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Can we please focus? We are supposed to be professionals. Holly said. Not me! said Orion cheerily, I'm just a Teenager with hormones running wild and may I say, young fairy lady, they're running wild in your direction.
Eoin Colfer
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A metaphorical weight lifted from his allegorical chest and Artemis Fowl felt himself again.
Eoin Colfer
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Me, Artemis blurted. I'm the nut. Artemis could have sworn the squid winked at him before bringing the five-ton chunk of spacecraft swinging down toward the morsel of meat in its blue shell. I'm the nut! Artemis shouted again, a little hysterically, it must be said.
Eoin Colfer
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I did what all good Iriah dads do when faced with a worthy adversary..I said Ask your mother!!
Eoin Colfer
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A pity to survive night flights over St. Georges Channel only to crack my skull falling from a ladder.
Eoin Colfer
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Remember this? You gave it to me for ensuring your trigger finger got reattached to your hand. You said it would remind me of that spark of decency inside me. I'm trying to do something decent now, Captain.
Eoin Colfer
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Well, I don't like the first bit and I don't know the last bit. So I'm really hoping the middle bit is exceptional.
Eoin Colfer
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Too much damned TV. Thinks he's Sherlock Holmes. That's professor Moriarty, corrected Foaly. Holmes, Moriarty, they both look the same with the flesh scorched off their skulls.
Eoin Colfer
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A fifeteen-year old, of to save the world, with faries. - Angeline Fowl
Eoin Colfer
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Chief of security : They have a tank! How did they get a tank up here?
Eoin Colfer
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My truffles? You took them? That's just mean!
Eoin Colfer