Quote

Well, I don't like the first bit and I don't know the last bit. So I'm really hoping the middle bit is exceptional.

Eoin Colfer

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Eoin Colfer
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: May 14
Author
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Wexford
First
Hoping
Really
Bits
Like
Middle
Lasts
Last
Wells
Firsts
Well
Exceptional

More quotes by Eoin Colfer

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And one more thing. About my name — Artemis — you were right. In London, it is generally a female name, after the Greek goddess of archery. But every now and then a male comes along with such a talent for hunting that he earns the right to use the name. I am that male. Artemis the hunter. I hunted you.
Eoin Colfer
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This was a nightmare scenario for any bodyguard: stuck in the middle of a transparent tube, several miles underwater, with a murdering band of fugitives at one end and an enthralled but still highly skilled police officer at the other.
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Holly, do you trust me?” Holly groaned. “Artemis, don’t ask me that. I just know one of your outrageous plans is coming.” “Do you trust me?” “Yes,” Holly sighed. “I do. More than anyone.
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It'll be messy, but after a day you'll be zipping around as though you were a thousand years old again.
Eoin Colfer
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You wouldn't know a clue if it danced in front of you with a T-Shirt that read 'I'm a clue
Eoin Colfer
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Too much damned TV. Thinks he's Sherlock Holmes. That's professor Moriarty, corrected Foaly. Holmes, Moriarty, they both look the same with the flesh scorched off their skulls.
Eoin Colfer
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I'm right there with you, darlin'. Unless you step on a landmine, in which case I'm way back in the Operations Room.
Eoin Colfer
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Genius inspires resentment. A sad fact of life.
Eoin Colfer
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I am Butler. Anything I say sounds scary.
Eoin Colfer
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Artemis ducked. Cudgeon didn't. Guess what? Artemis was smarter.
Eoin Colfer
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Hilarious, dude. You should, like, have your own show.
Eoin Colfer
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Everything rests on the poisoned wine. If it were just the queen, I could force it down her gullet, but Declan Broekhart would run me through with that damned ceremonial sword, and if his wife's stares were daggers, he'd be dead already.
Eoin Colfer
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Mulch's tongue lolled out, resting on the centaur's neck. Mmm, he mumbled around his tongue. Horse. Tasty Let's go, said Foaly nervously. Let's go right now.
Eoin Colfer
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I am unarmed. But Butler here, my ...ah...butler, has a Sig Saucer in his shoulder holster, two shrike-throwing knives in his boots, aderringer two-shot up his sleeve, garrotte wire in his watch, and three stun greanades concealed in variouse pockets. Anything else, Butler?
Eoin Colfer
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Look at those two. Wasting time. You wouldn't catch me doing that.
Eoin Colfer
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Don't try to understand me, just be grateful that you felt the warmth of Zaphod Beeblebrox's aura on your wonderstruck face.
Eoin Colfer
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Don’t feel bad I regularly reduce people to unintelligible stammers.
Eoin Colfer
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The two of them went down in a heap, with not even a turkey to break their fall.
Eoin Colfer
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Vinyaya was being openly antagonistic, and that was an emotion that could be trusted, unless of course it was a bluff and the commander was a secret fan of his, unless it was a double bluff and she really did feel antagonistic.
Eoin Colfer
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In spite of what youngsters think, parents do not get a sneaky thrill out of punishing their children.
Eoin Colfer