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Well, I don't like the first bit and I don't know the last bit. So I'm really hoping the middle bit is exceptional.

Eoin Colfer

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Eoin Colfer
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: May 14
Author
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Wexford
Well
Exceptional
First
Hoping
Really
Bits
Like
Middle
Lasts
Last
Wells
Firsts

More quotes by Eoin Colfer

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Mulch was not impressed. 'I'm not impressed,' he said.
Eoin Colfer
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Who or what inspires you? I must admit that I often read my own articles in scientific journals and inspire myself.
Eoin Colfer
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In spite of what youngsters think, parents do not get a sneaky thrill out of punishing their children.
Eoin Colfer
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No alcohol, Riley. She nodded at the screen. How are you liking the twenty-first century? Riley burped. The Take That are most melodic. And God bless Harry Potter is all I can say. If not for him, all of London would have been consumed by the dark arts.
Eoin Colfer
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...This is the only way. I will not allow humans or fairies to die when I might have prevented it.” Butler would not give up. “Listen to yourself. You sound like a... like a good guy! There’s nothing in this for you.
Eoin Colfer
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People like me, LB, the truly great ones ... we are always alone.
Eoin Colfer
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Knock yourself out... Or rather, don't.
Eoin Colfer
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Don't you worry about that, Mr. Adamsson. Why don't you head back to Reykjavik and spend some of that extortionate fee you charged me for a couple of hours' usage of your frankly third-rate restaurant and perhaps find a friendless tree stump to listen to your woes?
Eoin Colfer
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If you're going to read five books, three should be issues and two for fun.
Eoin Colfer
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We lost the crickets, she said. Even you can't make that sound tough. ...I am Butler, he said with a straight-face. Everything I say sounds tough. Now, get out of the lake, fairy.
Eoin Colfer
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I bet, said Mulch, that you would set the world on fire just to watch it burn. Opal tapped the suggestion into a small electronic notepad on her pocket computer. Thanks for that. Now, tell me everything.
Eoin Colfer
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Is that how you're going to take me? Scare me into voluntarily coming aboard, then steal my Ice Cube? It's always cubes with you, noted Foaly, somewhat randomly. What's wrong with a nice sphere?
Eoin Colfer
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Everything rests on the poisoned wine. If it were just the queen, I could force it down her gullet, but Declan Broekhart would run me through with that damned ceremonial sword, and if his wife's stares were daggers, he'd be dead already.
Eoin Colfer
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(text message) CMDR ROOT. TRBLE BELOW. HAVN OVRRN BY GOBLINS. PLCE PLAZA SRROUNDED. CUDGEON + OPL KBOI BHND PLOT. NO WPONS OR CMMUNICATIONS. DNA CNONS CNTRLLED BY KBOI. I M TRPPED IN OP BTH. CNCL THNKS IM 2 BLM. IF ALIVE PLSE HLP. IF NOT, WRNG NMBR.
Eoin Colfer
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Being in command means making tough decisions. Not being in command means shutting up and doing what you're told. --Artemis Fowl
Eoin Colfer
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Mulch's tongue lolled out, resting on the centaur's neck. Mmm, he mumbled around his tongue. Horse. Tasty Let's go, said Foaly nervously. Let's go right now.
Eoin Colfer
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Oh,It's going to be so easy to kill you,scoffed Opal.
Eoin Colfer
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Scientists are the enemies of tradition , and tradition own all the prisons. - Victor Vigny
Eoin Colfer
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If it looks like a Dwarf, and it smells like a Dwarf, then it's probably a Dwarf or a latrine wearing dungerees.
Eoin Colfer
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Artemis: I am not buoyed by that. Foaly: You are not supposed to be buoyed by that. You are supposed to be equalized. Mulch: I'm pretty sure that both of you just made really horrible jokes. But I'm not sure because I think you broke my funny bone.
Eoin Colfer