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In my experience, boys are predictable. As soon as they think of something, they do it. Girls are smarter—they plan ahead. They think about not getting caught.

Eoin Colfer

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Eoin Colfer
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: May 14
Author
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Wexford
Boys
Predictable
Getting
Smarter
Girl
Ahead
Experience
Caught
Something
Plan
Think
Girls
Thinking
Soon
Plans

More quotes by Eoin Colfer

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That’s what I thought. When I looked that human in the face. I figured he was either a genius or crazy.” Artemis’s cool eyes glared at them from the screen. “So which is it?” asked Foaly. “A genius or crazy?” Root grabbed his tri-barreled blaster from the gun rack. “What’s the difference?
Eoin Colfer
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Scientists are the enemies of tradition , and tradition own all the prisons. - Victor Vigny
Eoin Colfer
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A monkey glances up and sees a banana, and that's as far as he looks. A visionary looks up and sees the moon.
Eoin Colfer
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As a child, Zaphod had been diagnosed with ADHDDAAADHD (ntm) ABT which stood for Always Dreaming His Dopey Days Away, Also Attention Deficit Hyperflactulance Disorder (not to mention) A Bit Thick.
Eoin Colfer
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Stay back, human. You don't know what you're dealing with.
Eoin Colfer
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I did what all good Iriah dads do when faced with a worthy adversary..I said Ask your mother!!
Eoin Colfer
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Don't try to understand me, just be grateful that you felt the warmth of Zaphod Beeblebrox's aura on your wonderstruck face.
Eoin Colfer
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Good. Illegal is always faster.
Eoin Colfer
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The humans were protecting their heritage, or so they thought. Strange that Mud Men seem more concerned about the past than the present.
Eoin Colfer
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It was calling me, that button, he offered as his excuse. I couldn't resist. -MULCH DIGGUMS ON A HIGHLY PRESS-ABLE BUTTON-
Eoin Colfer
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Why can't we for once have a meeting in Starbucks?
Eoin Colfer
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A metaphorical weight lifted from his allegorical chest and Artemis Fowl felt himself again.
Eoin Colfer
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Stupid. Stupid. Foaly, we are both imbeciles. I don't expect lateral thinking from the LEP, but from you... ... What is it? [Holly] asked, afraid of the answer, which must surely be terrible. Yeah, agreed Foaly, who always had time to feel insulted. Why am I an imbecile?
Eoin Colfer
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Foaly: Anyone see you come in here? Holly: The FBI, CIA, NSA, DEA, MI6. Oh, and the EIB. Foaly: The EIB? Holly: (smirking) Everyone in the building.
Eoin Colfer
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There were only two men on the planet better educated in the various martial arts than Butler, and he was related to one of them. The other lived on an island in the South China Sea, and spent his days meditating and beating up palm trees. You had to feel sorry for the B'wa Kell.
Eoin Colfer
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Everything rests on the poisoned wine. If it were just the queen, I could force it down her gullet, but Declan Broekhart would run me through with that damned ceremonial sword, and if his wife's stares were daggers, he'd be dead already.
Eoin Colfer
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Together we will be unstoppable.
Eoin Colfer
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Have you ever heard of the theory of relativity? Artemis blinked. Is this a joke? I have traveled through time, Doctor. I think I know a little something about relativity.
Eoin Colfer
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Are you saying that you people knew about these amorophobots all the time? Of course we did. They attacked us in Iceland. Remember? No. I was unconscious.
Eoin Colfer
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Artemis: How long will it take you to prepare the time spell? N1 chewed his knuckle: About as long as it takes you to take your clothes off. Aaarrk, Artemis half choked.
Eoin Colfer