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The only other scenario that could explain everything, up to and including your own bizarre apperance, is a convoluted conspiracy theory involving the Russian Mafia and a crack team of plastic surgeons.
Eoin Colfer
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Eoin Colfer
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: May 14
Author
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Wexford
Everything
Conspiracy
Convoluted
Russian
Mafia
Cracks
Scenario
Plastic
Surgeons
Explain
Scenarios
Including
Involving
Theory
Crack
Team
Bizarre
More quotes by Eoin Colfer
Holly, do you trust me?” Holly groaned. “Artemis, don’t ask me that. I just know one of your outrageous plans is coming.” “Do you trust me?” “Yes,” Holly sighed. “I do. More than anyone.
Eoin Colfer
Wait, said Butler. Just wait, Holly. Artemis has a plan. He squinted through the green dome. What is your plan, Artemis? All Artemis could do was smile and shrug.
Eoin Colfer
Doobie always wanted to see the badge. It was shiny, and he was eight.
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Vinyaya was being openly antagonistic, and that was an emotion that could be trusted, unless of course it was a bluff and the commander was a secret fan of his, unless it was a double bluff and she really did feel antagonistic.
Eoin Colfer
And one more thing. About my name — Artemis — you were right. In London, it is generally a female name, after the Greek goddess of archery. But every now and then a male comes along with such a talent for hunting that he earns the right to use the name. I am that male. Artemis the hunter. I hunted you.
Eoin Colfer
Knock yourself out... Or rather, don't.
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Her glare was so intense that you completely forgot she was wearing pink.
Eoin Colfer
In spite of what youngsters think, parents do not get a sneaky thrill out of punishing their children.
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People like me, LB, the truly great ones ... we are always alone.
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Together we will be unstoppable.
Eoin Colfer
Hit that back-stabber where it hurts, right in the ambition.
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Scientists are the enemies of tradition , and tradition own all the prisons. - Victor Vigny
Eoin Colfer
I am charging you with the protection of my mother and friends, not to mention keeping my younger self off the Internet. He is as dangerous as Opal.
Eoin Colfer
I'm LEP. A captain. No rent-a-cop gnome is going to stand in the way of my orders.
Eoin Colfer
Don’t feel bad I regularly reduce people to unintelligible stammers.
Eoin Colfer
Ignorance, as they say, is usually fatal, but sometimes it can be bliss.
Eoin Colfer
My bugs don't have bugs.
Eoin Colfer
(to Foaly) Captain Short's life is in danger, so push the button before I climb that tower and push it with your face!
Eoin Colfer
Everything rests on the poisoned wine. If it were just the queen, I could force it down her gullet, but Declan Broekhart would run me through with that damned ceremonial sword, and if his wife's stares were daggers, he'd be dead already.
Eoin Colfer
You know you're in trouble when your own imagination starts punishing you.
Eoin Colfer
