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I'm LEP. A captain. No rent-a-cop gnome is going to stand in the way of my orders.

Eoin Colfer

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Eoin Colfer
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: May 14
Author
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Wexford
Way
Rent
Captain
Orders
Cop
Captains
Stand
Order
Going
Gnome

More quotes by Eoin Colfer

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Who or what inspires you? I must admit that I often read my own articles in scientific journals and inspire myself.
Eoin Colfer
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And it's amazing how much noise people ignoring each other can make.
Eoin Colfer
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Of course. Opal is toying with our emotions for her own gratification. Nothing more. She wishes to place herself in a position of power, emotionally.
Eoin Colfer
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Benny was awake again. Happened every morning.
Eoin Colfer
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In my experience, boys are predictable. As soon as they think of something, they do it. Girls are smarter—they plan ahead. They think about not getting caught.
Eoin Colfer
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The sarcasm made a slight whistling noise as it flew over Loafers' head.
Eoin Colfer
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I never tell anyone exactly how clever I am. They would be too scared.
Eoin Colfer
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Connor Broekhart was born to fly, or more accurately he was born flying.
Eoin Colfer
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...Hardly. A ragged apron does not a waiter make.
Eoin Colfer
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Let us proceed under the assumption that the fairy folk do exist, and that I am not a gibbering moron.
Eoin Colfer
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Hilarious, dude. You should, like, have your own show.
Eoin Colfer
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I am not exuding anything, said Holly through gritted teeth. Orion tapped her shoulder. I beg to differ. You're exuding right now, a wonderful aura. It's pastel blue with little dolphins.
Eoin Colfer
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I am older and have more control over my empathy,' said Qwan. 'That's why I didn't throw up.' And having said that, he threw up.
Eoin Colfer
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I have no time for babbling foolishness.” “Don’t be so hasty,” said Victor. “There’s always time for babbling.
Eoin Colfer
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If you're going to read five books, three should be issues and two for fun.
Eoin Colfer
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Mulch's tongue lolled out, resting on the centaur's neck. Mmm, he mumbled around his tongue. Horse. Tasty Let's go, said Foaly nervously. Let's go right now.
Eoin Colfer
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Have you ever heard of the theory of relativity? Artemis blinked. Is this a joke? I have traveled through time, Doctor. I think I know a little something about relativity.
Eoin Colfer
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Very well. I understand. Just ... shut up!
Eoin Colfer
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Oh,It's going to be so easy to kill you,scoffed Opal.
Eoin Colfer
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We lost the crickets, she said. Even you can't make that sound tough. ...I am Butler, he said with a straight-face. Everything I say sounds tough. Now, get out of the lake, fairy.
Eoin Colfer