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They call me Good Time Emo. Because I love a good time! And my name is Emo.

Emo Philips

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Emo Philips
Age: 68
Born: 1956
Born: February 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Stand-Up Comedy
Chicago
Illinois
Love
Emo
Name
Names
Call
Good
Time

More quotes by Emo Philips

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When deciding between two competing theories, always go with the one that doesn't involve a magic spell.
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Countries are making nuclear weapons like there is no tomorrow.
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When I was 10, I beat up the school bully. His arms were in casts. That's what gave me the courage.
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My mother was like a sister to me, only we didn't have sex quite so often.
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I once had a large gay following, but I ducked into an alleyway and lost him.
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I've been wrestling with reality for most of my life. I'm pleased to say I've won.
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The other day a woman came up to me and said, Didn't I see you on television? I said, I don't know. You can't see out the other way.
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When I was a kid, I slept on rubber sheets, but now, I'm a man. And I can take the wetness!
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He taught me never to smile, which helps me when I visit disaster sites.
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If you can make just one person laugh, then you are already doing better than Tony Danza.
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Well, my brother says 'Hello.' So, hooray for speech therapy.
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Coming up with a funny joke is like falling in love: It can hit you any time, anywhere. Having said that, the more you put yourself out there, the better your odds will be.
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A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
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I've always thought the best way to teach a kid not to be scared of the dark is to fill his daylight hours with as much horror as possible.
Emo Philips
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I don't know how electricity works. All I know is that it calms me.
Emo Philips
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Charlie Chaplin is the greatest artist of the 20th century. He takes me from laughter to tears in seconds. And he was one of the very first funny men. It's like the original violins were made in Cremona and there's never been any better since. Sometimes the best come right off the bat.
Emo Philips
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People come up to me and say, 'Emo, do people really come up to you?'
Emo Philips
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The battle of the sexes will never be won as long as we keep sleeping with the enemy.
Emo Philips
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I'm learning Cuban. It's like Spanish, but with fewer words for luxury items.
Emo Philips
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I had a very close relationship with another kid when I was growing up. I was his imaginary friend.
Emo Philips