Quote

My dad always said, If someone hands you a lemon, make lemonade. Plus that also works wonderfully as a metaphor.

Emo Philips

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Emo Philips
Age: 68
Born: 1956
Born: February 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Stand-Up Comedy
Chicago
Illinois
Plus
Dad
Works
Hands
Lemonade
Someone
Lemon
Also
Lemons
Make
Wonderfully
Always
Metaphor

More quotes by Emo Philips

Image
I went into the gas station, said, Fill 'er up, Harry. The guy said, Regular? I said, No, put on a gorrila suit and dance like a fairy.
Emo Philips
Image
My sister just had a baby. We can have company over. She'll be in front of everyone with her um... breast... out feeding it. You know... cereal or whatever.
Emo Philips
Image
My sister married a German. He complained he couldn't get a good bagel back home. I said: 'Well, whose fault is that?'
Emo Philips
Image
They call me Good Time Emo. Because I love a good time! And my name is Emo.
Emo Philips
Image
I was walking down fifth avenue today and I found a wallet, and I was gonna keep it, rather than return it, but I thought: well, if I lost a hundred and fifty dollars, how would I feel? And I realized I would want to be taught a lesson.
Emo Philips
Image
My parents had very strict rules for me. Rules like, I couldn't be home until a certain hour.
Emo Philips
Image
When I was a kid, my nickname was Mr. Baseball. Because of the stitches.
Emo Philips
Image
At my lemonade stand I used to give the first glass away free and charge five dollars for the second glass. The refill contained the antidote.
Emo Philips
Image
I've always kind of pushed the envelope in terms of trying to get away with things no one else was going near. I always thought of myself like a mouse trying to get cheese that no one else could get without getting their tail snipped off.
Emo Philips
Image
I started doing stand-up at the age of 20. This was back in 1976, around the time (coincidence?) that the first comedy clubs were starting. The young comedians of today gasp when I tell them how many shows I did that first year: 500. Five nights a week.
Emo Philips
Image
Thinking up jokes is easy. The hard part is trying them out on stage, because you never know if they're funny until you get there. Not one comedian in the world ever really knows.
Emo Philips
Image
People come up to me and say, 'Emo, do people really come up to you?'
Emo Philips
Image
When I went to college, my parents threw a going away party for me, according to the letter.
Emo Philips
Image
My girlfriend said, Emo, I'm seeing another man. I said, Well, try rubbing your eyes or something.
Emo Philips
Image
Some mornings, it's just not worth chewing through the leather straps.
Emo Philips
Image
I think of my body as a temple. Or at least a relatively well-managed Presbyterian youth center.
Emo Philips
Image
I don't really hang out with people. I like to be by myself. In fact, I've been arrested a few times because I like to walk around at two or three in the morning, looking at shop windows. The cops take me to the station and fingerprint me. But I wouldn't call that hanging out.
Emo Philips
Image
Charlie Chaplin is the greatest artist of the 20th century. He takes me from laughter to tears in seconds. And he was one of the very first funny men. It's like the original violins were made in Cremona and there's never been any better since. Sometimes the best come right off the bat.
Emo Philips
Image
Probably the toughest time in anyone's life is when you have to murder a loved one because they're the devil.
Emo Philips
Image
If you can make just one person laugh, then you are already doing better than Tony Danza.
Emo Philips