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It's probably weird to think about an addiction like it's a sentient being, but that's how it feels. Like it's something living inside you. Something you can't get rid of because killing it means killing you.

Ellen Hopkins

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Ellen Hopkins
Age: 69
Born: 1955
Born: March 26
Novelist
Writer
Long Beach
California
Ellen Louise Hopkins
Like
Probably
Living
Means
Feels
Sentient
Mean
Addiction
Something
Weird
Think
Killing
Thinking
Inside

More quotes by Ellen Hopkins

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Do you ever dangle your toes over the precipice, dare the cliff to crumble, defy the frozen deity to suffer the sun, thaw feather and bone, take wing to fly you home?
Ellen Hopkins
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Even without them touching me, I feel dirty about what I do. Alex does even filthier things but says it all washes off with soap. I don’t believe that. I think it all leaves stains. Indelible stains.
Ellen Hopkins
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Only by confronting your demons can you ever hope to conquer them.
Ellen Hopkins
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Communication Was never big in my house. We sat together over dinner, but the only sound you'd hear was crunching and chewing and the little ones asking for more, please. We lived, all boxed up in invisible containers. We hardly knew the people we called sister or father. Jackie and I were the exceptions to that rule.
Ellen Hopkins
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But death doesn't scare me. To know exactly when I might expect it, up close and in my face, would actually be a comfort. Because to tell the truth, most of the time dying seems pretty much like my only means of escape.
Ellen Hopkins
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He's solid. You're fractured. He's hopeful. You're hopeless. He's always there. You're half there. He's faithful. You're so not. He's giving. You're afraid to give. He's honest. You lie all the time. He's loving. You don't know how to love.
Ellen Hopkins
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Eventually, it becomes a matter of scale. When the good outweighs the bad, you stay. When the bad is the only thing you notice anymore, you think about your future, or what's left of it, consider options.
Ellen Hopkins
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He has built a pedestal for her so tall that she is afraid to be lifted atop it, because to fall would mean certain death. But oh, she would rise far, far beyond fear and be held by arms so strong, and love so pure, that falling would not be an option.
Ellen Hopkins
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Every high has an equal, measurable low.
Ellen Hopkins
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Grown up? Me? I suppose I have. Killing things, and almost killing myself, must have changed me some, after all.
Ellen Hopkins
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I was about six years old, still Daddy's little girl, even though Daddy couldn't care less about me. How could I expect any man every would?
Ellen Hopkins
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Funny how when your life is mostly bullshit, you turn off feeling. Sometimes it's hard to turn it back on again.
Ellen Hopkins
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Girls are impossible to satisfy. Not every girl. Not me. I'd be happy if he'd just like me a little.
Ellen Hopkins
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When all choice is taken from you, life becomes a game of survival.
Ellen Hopkins
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Don't make me laugh, I'd much rather cry.
Ellen Hopkins
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THE BAD THING ABOUT FEAR Is it requires a reaction. Some hide. Some cry. But, like a dog condemned to a walled yard with no hope of escape or affection, some learn to bite.
Ellen Hopkins
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I mean, if you're gonna purposely lose your mind, you want to get it back some day. Don't you? Okay, maybe not.
Ellen Hopkins
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God i've missed you. I can't wait to give you your present. He kisses me hotter this time, and beneath me, through his denim and mine. I can feel the promise of his Christmas gift soon to come.
Ellen Hopkins
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Ghosts don't scare me. Flesh and blood people do.
Ellen Hopkins
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Can a dream be wrong? Aren't dreams God's way of telling you things?
Ellen Hopkins