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What would bug the Taliban more than seeing a gay woman in a suit surrounded by Jews?
Ellen DeGeneres
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Ellen DeGeneres
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: January 26
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Presenter
Screenwriter
Talk Show Host
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Metairie
Louisiana
Ellen Lee DeGeneres
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More quotes by Ellen DeGeneres
You listen to any monologue on late-night TV or just in general, to people talking, and there's always a joke at someone's expense. It's sarcasm it's nasty. Kids grow up hearing that, and they think that's what humor is, and they think it's OK. But that negativity permeates the entire planet.
Ellen DeGeneres
I'm not going to say who looks the most beautiful, but it's clear. It's Jared Leto. I mean, he's the prettiest. Boy is he pretty
Ellen DeGeneres
You should never assume. You know what happens when you assume. You make an ass out of you and me because that's how it's spelled.
Ellen DeGeneres
We focus so much on our differences, and that is creating, I think, a lot of chaos and negativity and bullying in the world. And I think if everybody focused on what we all have in common - which is - we all want to be happy.
Ellen DeGeneres
I don't really ever live my life in fear. I really live my life in gratitude and feeling positive for the most part.
Ellen DeGeneres
Comedy can be, especially in a writer's room, really aggressive, kind of a very male-dominated room, and it would be hard for women. It's not a nurturing place. It's not like a lot of women are going to say, I can't wait to live that lifestyle and be in a writer's room until 2 or 3 a.m.
Ellen DeGeneres
Don't you hate when people are late to work. And they always have the worst excuses. Oh, I'm sorry I'm late, traffic. Traffic, huh? How do you think I got here helicoptered in!?
Ellen DeGeneres
I won't have a hard time being brutally honest. But I won't be mean. You don't have to be mean to be honest.
Ellen DeGeneres
Now airlines charge for everything... If the oxygen mask drops, you have to swipe your credit card to start the flow of the oxygen.
Ellen DeGeneres
I'm sure there's somebody out there who doesn't like Betty White because she's short and has white hair.
Ellen DeGeneres
Have you ever thought about toothpaste? Ellen has! And she makes a point about all of the types of toothpaste that Colgate offers!
Ellen DeGeneres
It's funny how cucumber water can taste so much better than pickle juice, even though they come from the same source.
Ellen DeGeneres
Quick decision makers are often stuck behind annoying people in line at Starbucks.
Ellen DeGeneres
Usually, I wear tennis shoes because my feet are flat, and it hurts to wear anything other than shoes that are cushiony.
Ellen DeGeneres
I like sitting at outdoor restaurants it would be nice to go someplace on the street and not worry about somebody taking my picture while I'm about to take a bite of something.
Ellen DeGeneres
It makes a big difference in your life when you stay positive.
Ellen DeGeneres
Some of the most devastating things that happen to you will teach you the most
Ellen DeGeneres
I don't want to get the same looks I give people when they get on a plane holding a baby: That's a cute baby, just keep walking, keep walking, keep going, keep going.
Ellen DeGeneres
If you want to get rid of stuff, you can always do a good spring-cleaning. Or you can do what I do. Move.
Ellen DeGeneres
Really, he called me that? Ellen DeGenerate? I've been getting that since fourth grade. I guess I'm happy I could give him work.
Ellen DeGeneres
