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What did the letter O say to Q? Dude, your dikk is hanging out.

Ellen DeGeneres

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Ellen DeGeneres
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: January 26
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Presenter
Screenwriter
Talk Show Host
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Metairie
Louisiana
Ellen Lee DeGeneres
Hanging
Letter
Letters
Funny
Dude

More quotes by Ellen DeGeneres

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I am saddened by how people treat one another and how we are so shut off from one another and how we judge one another, when the truth is, we are all one connected thing. We are all from the same exact molecules.
Ellen DeGeneres
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I do it because I love animals and I saw the reality. And I just couldn't ignore it anymore. I'm healthier for it, I'm happier for it. I can't imagine that if you're putting something in your body that is filled with fear or anxiety or pain, that that isn't somehow going to be inside of you.
Ellen DeGeneres
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For some reason, we can't just enjoy somebody else's success. Somehow, that's going to affect us. If they have more, then I have less - and I don't know why.
Ellen DeGeneres
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Be open to learning new lessons, even if they contradict the lessons you learned yesterday.
Ellen DeGeneres
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I hope I make people feel better. I hope I take people out of their situations a little bit and make them happier. That's really why I do what I do.
Ellen DeGeneres
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That woman in the shampoo commercial - she's happy. She's... she's too happy.
Ellen DeGeneres
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No one is perfect, except for Penélope Cruz.
Ellen DeGeneres
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The only way a no-legged leopard could hurt you is if it fell out of a tree onto your head.
Ellen DeGeneres
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The stand up, everything was accidental. I never grew up and was the class clown and had to get the attention. It was - it really is, I have a career despite myself.
Ellen DeGeneres
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Accept who you are. Unless you're a serial killer.
Ellen DeGeneres
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I think there's a whole bunch of things that go along with being a girl. You're not supposed to have opinions or be tough or strong. You're supposed to be soft and vulnerable, and I find those qualities important in both men and women.
Ellen DeGeneres
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Though you feel you're not where you're suppose to be, you shouldn't worry because that next turn that you take, it will lead you to where you wanna go.
Ellen DeGeneres
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Never follow anyone else's path, unless you're in the woods and you're lost.
Ellen DeGeneres
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Penguins mate for life. Which doesn't really surprise me, because they all look exactly alike. It's not like they're gonna meet a better-looking penguin someday.
Ellen DeGeneres
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I had done a sitcom and a movie and hosted the Emmys, and all of a sudden, I lost everything. As someone put it at the time, I was suddenly like a Ferrari in neutral.
Ellen DeGeneres
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Beauty is about being comfortable in your own skin. It's about knowing and accepting who you are.
Ellen DeGeneres
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I talked to Beyonce and she wants to learn how to speak Arabic and she wants to jump out of an airplane. I don't want to do that. I just don't want to wash my hair every day.
Ellen DeGeneres
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Yeah I'm thirty-six, but on the show I'm thirty-two. Nobody wants to watch a thirty-six year old woman, so they decided to make me thirty-two. Much more appealing somehow.
Ellen DeGeneres
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You know that song that asks, Why do fools fall in love?? I think the obvious answer is because they're fools.
Ellen DeGeneres
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When we were growing up our parents somehow made it clear that being famous was good. And I mistakenly thought that if I was famous then everyone would love me.
Ellen DeGeneres