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I don't need a baby growing inside me for nine months. If I'm going to feel nauseous and achy when I wake up, I want to achieve that state the old-fashioned way: getting good and drunk the night before.
Ellen DeGeneres
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Ellen DeGeneres
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: January 26
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
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Screenwriter
Talk Show Host
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Metairie
Louisiana
Ellen Lee DeGeneres
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More quotes by Ellen DeGeneres
I see those picketers, and I think you know, if I weren't a loving, non-violent, spiritual person, I would really go over there and grab those signs and smash them over their heads and shove them up their asses. But...I'm a loving, spiritual person.
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You just have to keep driving down the road. It's going to bend and curve and you'll speed up and slow down, but the road keeps going.
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I'm not going to say who looks the most beautiful, but it's clear. It's Jared Leto. I mean, he's the prettiest. Boy is he pretty
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It must be around forty, when you're over the hill. I don't even know what that means and why it's a bad thing. When I go hiking and I get over the hill, that means I'm past the hard part and there's a snack in my future. That's a good thing as far as I'm concerned.
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Sometimes you can't see yourself clearly until you see yourself through the eyes of others.
Ellen DeGeneres
Do we have to know who's gay and who's straight? Can't we just love everybody and judge them by the car they drive?
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You know, radio DJ's must really love to talk to theirselves. Especially when they have the graveyard shift. 'Hey this is Ellen with 89.1. It is currently three in the morning. There are few cars on the road. And it your still listening heres a little music to get you to dance.
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I still have the shirt I wore my first time on Johnny Carson's show. Only now I use it as a tablecloth at dinner parties. It was very blousy.
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Comedy can be, especially in a writer's room, really aggressive, kind of a very male-dominated room, and it would be hard for women. It's not a nurturing place. It's not like a lot of women are going to say, I can't wait to live that lifestyle and be in a writer's room until 2 or 3 a.m.
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It's a lot of work to put a brand-new monologue and a brand-new show on the air and find comedy every single day. It's challenging and it's the hardest thing I have ever done, but it's the best-suited thing for me. The more relaxed I get and the more confident I feel, the more I get to play and be myself...
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I'm a godmother, that's a great thing to be, a godmother. She calls me god for short, that's cute, I taught her that.
Ellen DeGeneres
I just want to find somebody special, somebody that I click with.
Ellen DeGeneres
I do it because I love animals and I saw the reality. And I just couldn't ignore it anymore. I'm healthier for it, I'm happier for it. I can't imagine that if you're putting something in your body that is filled with fear or anxiety or pain, that that isn't somehow going to be inside of you.
Ellen DeGeneres
I don't really ever live my life in fear. I really live my life in gratitude and feeling positive for the most part.
Ellen DeGeneres
I get to do stand-up every single day. I love that live energy exchange between the audience and myself, and to get to say the things I want to say and comment on.
Ellen DeGeneres
Being a teenager and figuring out who you are is hard enough without someone attacking you.
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You know me. Any excuse to put on a dress.
Ellen DeGeneres
I think gender plays a part in most things, but I don't know how it would be different because I've never been a man. And my fame is different from Nicole Kidman's or Sharon Stone's. I think everybody's fame is different.
Ellen DeGeneres
I think beauty comes from actually knowing who you are. That's real beauty to me.
Ellen DeGeneres
I don't know what people are scared of...maybe they think their children will be influenced by gay marriage, but I've got to tell you, I was raised by two heterosexuals. Everywhere I looked - heterosexuals. And they did not influence me. It's time we love people for who they are and let them love who they want.
Ellen DeGeneres