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The reason I do what I do is because I was influenced by Steve Martin, by Woody Allen, by Bob Newhart, by Carol Burnett, by Lucille Ball.

Ellen DeGeneres

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Ellen DeGeneres
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: January 26
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Presenter
Screenwriter
Talk Show Host
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Metairie
Louisiana
Ellen Lee DeGeneres
Martin
Lucille
Influenced
Burnett
Ball
Carol
Balls
Carols
Reason
Allen
Woody
Steve
Bob

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I'm a godmother, that's a great thing to be, a godmother. She calls me god for short, that's cute, I taught her that.
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No matter how popular you are as a stand-up - you can go out and fill a 10,000-seat arena and be smart and funny - it's delicate to host an awards show and know where your place is and know that it's not about you, that it's about the people who are nominated, and respect that, but at the same time have your moment to show them who you are.
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When people show me clothing that seems very, very feminine, it's hard for me to embrace that, because it just doesn't feel like me.
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Do things that make you happy within the confines of the legal system.
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I won't have a hard time being brutally honest. But I won't be mean. You don't have to be mean to be honest.
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The legend goes that St. Patrick drove the snakes out of Ireland. I was thinking... that must be hard to put all the tiny seatbelts on all the snakes.
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I think beauty comes from actually knowing who you are. That's real beauty to me.
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Right before I decided to come out, I went on a spiritual retreat called 'Changing the Inner Dialogue of Your Subconscious Mind.' I'd never been to anything like it before, and all my friends were taking bets on how long I'd last with no TV, no radio, no phone. But for me that was the beginning of paying attention to all the little things.
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If there weren't blacks, Jews and gays, there would no Oscars. Or anyone named Oscar, if you think about that.
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I love clothes, so when I wear clothes, they're usually somebody's. You know, I'm not wearing Kmart.
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I feel like I have a hangover, without all the happy memories and mystery bruises.
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There's no one way to dance. And that's kind of my philosophy about everything.
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What you look like on the outside is not what makes you cool at all. I mean, I had a mullet and wore parachute pants for a long, long time, and I'm doin' okay.
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The stand up, everything was accidental. I never grew up and was the class clown and had to get the attention. It was - it really is, I have a career despite myself.
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I was coming home from kindergarten - well they told me it was kindergarten. I found out later I had been working in a factory for ten years. It's good for a kid to know how to make gloves.
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Don't you hate when people are late to work. And they always have the worst excuses. Oh, I'm sorry I'm late, traffic. Traffic, huh? How do you think I got here helicoptered in!?
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A circus! 100 clowns of injustice have climbed out of the tiny clown car of this court room.
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For some reason, we can't just enjoy somebody else's success. Somehow, that's going to affect us. If they have more, then I have less - and I don't know why.
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Though you feel you're not where you're suppose to be, you shouldn't worry because that next turn that you take, it will lead you to where you wanna go.
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You have to have funny faces and words, you can't just have words. It is a powerful thing, and I think that's why it's hard for people to imagine that women can do that, be that powerful.
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