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I ask people why they have deer heads on their walls. They always say because it's such a beautiful animal. There you go. I think my mother is attractive, but I have photographs of her.

Ellen DeGeneres

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Ellen DeGeneres
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: January 26
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Presenter
Screenwriter
Talk Show Host
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Metairie
Louisiana
Ellen Lee DeGeneres
People
Animal
Heads
Taxidermy
Asks
Cruelty
Deer
Funny
Attractive
Vegan
Mother
Photograph
Photographs
Beautiful
Mom
Sarcastic
Always
Wall
Vegetarian
Think
Humor
Hunting
Thinking
Humanity
Walls

More quotes by Ellen DeGeneres

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The way I see it... If you need both of your hands for whatever it is you're doing, then your brain should probably be in on it too.
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Save a life this Thanksgiving, and join me in starting a new tradition by adopting a turkey instead of eating one through Farm Sanctuary's Adopt-A-Turkey Project.
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The thing everyone should realize is that the key to happiness is being happy for yourself and yourself.
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You listen to any monologue on late-night TV or just in general, to people talking, and there's always a joke at someone's expense. It's sarcasm it's nasty. Kids grow up hearing that, and they think that's what humor is, and they think it's OK. But that negativity permeates the entire planet.
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Normally, I try not to pay attention to my haters, but this time I'd like to talk about it, because my haters are my motivators.
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I wonder what will happen if i put a hand cream on my feet, will they get confused and start clapping?
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I admire people who know they can't sing. There are so many people out there who can't sing, but they think they can, so they sing a lot.
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When people show me clothing that seems very, very feminine, it's hard for me to embrace that, because it just doesn't feel like me.
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When you take risks you learn that there will be times when you succeed and there will be times when you fail, and both are equally important. It's hard to understand failure when you're going through it, but in the grand scheme of things it's good to fall down - not because you're drunk and not near stairs.
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The legend goes that St. Patrick drove the snakes out of Ireland. I was thinking... that must be hard to put all the tiny seatbelts on all the snakes.
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I think furniture is art. I don't think art is just for your walls - I think everything that someone has made is a piece of art.
Ellen DeGeneres
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The world is full of a lot of fear and a lot of negativity, and a lot of judgment. I just think people need to start shifting into joy and happiness. As corny as it sounds, we need to make a shift.
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I had done a sitcom and a movie and hosted the Emmys, and all of a sudden, I lost everything. As someone put it at the time, I was suddenly like a Ferrari in neutral.
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I get my dance moves from just moving around and listening to music and not really worrying about if it's perfect or not.
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You should never assume. You know what happens when you assume. You make an ass out of you and me because that's how it's spelled.
Ellen DeGeneres
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My point is, life is about balance. The good and the bad. The highs and the lows. The pina and the colada.
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I know there's always going to be feedback no matter what the subject. I am shocked by somebody commenting on my shoes or my clothes. Everyone has an opinion, everyone is logging about everything and has an opinion. So I can't possibly pay attention to that.
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I cannot believe they haven't yet come up with a better screening process than the mammogram. If a man had to put his special parts inside a clamp to test him for anything, I think they would come up with a new plan before the doctor finished saying, Put that thing there so I can crush it.
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Don't you hate when people are late to work. And they always have the worst excuses. Oh, I'm sorry I'm late, traffic. Traffic, huh? How do you think I got here helicoptered in!?
Ellen DeGeneres
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You know me. Any excuse to put on a dress.
Ellen DeGeneres