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You ready? Evan asks, and he's looking at me, and I love his hair, I love his smile, I lo--I Love You, I say, and as I watch his smile bloom I finally get how great those three little words are. I finally get what they really mean.

Elizabeth Scott

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Elizabeth Scott
Great
Ready
Really
Asks
Evan
Love
Looking
Bloom
Words
Finally
Three
Smile
Littles
Watches
Little
Watch
Mean
Hair

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She became a story, one I have mostly forgotten. One I can't end because she died a long time ago.
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Anger can try to break your heart, but sorrow is what will. What can. What does.
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I wish it had never happened because then I wouldn't think about it as I'm falling asleep.
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I don't know how I know that, but I do. I can feel the beat of that truth inside me. Taste it bitter on my tongue. Sometimes, like now, I didn't think I want to know who I really am.
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I-I don't usually go around throwing rocks at people's windows. Or saying that I've wanted to kiss you since your first day at work, when you wanted to know why we had three codes for fish sandwiches when we only sold one kind.
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This is the real unwritten rule: You don't want what you know you shouldn't. And I haven't just broken that rule. I have wrecked it, smashed it, and still... And still I want.
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The thing is, that world doesn't exist. All growing up means is that your realize no one will come along to fix things. No one will come along to save you.
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Little Alice, all hollowed out, so easy to smash into a million little pieces.
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But I know a lie when I hear one.
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Whatever happened to me just now has gotten to me, broken past the fragile shell I've built. More than my memory is gone. My soul has wings that beat to a heart I don't understand and I see things, feel things that I know aren't from here, but that are so real.
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Talking about someone who makes you happy actually makes you happy. Being happy makes you want to talk, to go over everything, to share it so you can remember it all over again.
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