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When women are depressed, they eat or go shopping.
Elayne Boosler
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Elayne Boosler
Age: 72
Born: 1952
Born: August 18
Actor
Comedian
Brooklyn
New York
Women
Shopaholic
Groceries
Depressed
Shopping
More quotes by Elayne Boosler
The Vatican is against surrogate mothers. Good thing they didn't have that rule when Jesus was born.
Elayne Boosler
I read books that say if you want to keep sex hot you tell a person what you want. How do you tell 'em you want somebody else?
Elayne Boosler
I didn't get a high school diploma. I really didn't have much of an education, which left me open to educating myself throughout my life, without the limitations on intellectual curiosity a formal education can impose. I followed what interested me.
Elayne Boosler
Wouldn’t it be great to see a line in all movie credits that truthfully says, “Nobody was harmed in the making of this film, and at the cast party, all animals got a belly belly belly rub”.
Elayne Boosler
You know you are in love when you are willing to share your cash-machine number.
Elayne Boosler
Horse racing is waning in popularity.
Elayne Boosler
I love my parents and they're wonderful people, but they were strict, and I still look for ways to get even. When I got my own apartment for the very first time and they came to stay with me for the weekend, I made them stay in separate bedrooms.
Elayne Boosler
People want sex education out of the schools. They believe sex education causes promiscuity. Hey, I took algebra, but I never do math.
Elayne Boosler
You never see a man walking down the street with a woman who has a little potbelly and a bald spot.
Elayne Boosler
I can't get married. I can't fake sleep for 30 years.
Elayne Boosler
I run everywhere and eavesdrop. It's the best way to see a city.
Elayne Boosler
For a single woman, preparing for company means wiping the lipstick off the milk carton.
Elayne Boosler
Most people love animals, and most people love to laugh. Combining the two makes both resonate deeper.
Elayne Boosler
My belief is that guns are too easy to get in America. My belief is that the NRA has bought much of our congress, to the point that guns are actually the only unregulated consumer product in America. Think about that. It's stunning.
Elayne Boosler
Laundry's easier when you live alone. Fifteen minutes before a date, put 'em on, dry 'em with a hair blower.
Elayne Boosler
I deliver very traditionally, and people aren't threatened. I think if I cursed or seemed wilder, I couldn't get away with the amount of very opinionated politics I get away with.
Elayne Boosler
To listen to your own silence is the key to comedy.
Elayne Boosler
My ancestors wandered lost in the wilderness for forty years because even in biblical times, men would not stop to ask for directions.
Elayne Boosler
I think about death. I don't want to die with clothes in the cleaners.
Elayne Boosler
Ever notice that Soup for One is eight aisles away from Party Mix?
Elayne Boosler