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But puberty was... well, before puberty, at school, I didn't tell kids I was a transvestite 'cause I thought they might kill me with sticks, you know?

Eddie Izzard

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Eddie Izzard
Age: 62
Born: 1962
Born: February 7
Actor
Comedian
Improviser
Politician
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Edward John Izzard
Eddie John Izzard
Edward Jonathan Izzard
Eddie Jonathan Izzard
Edward Izzard
Edward J. Izzard
Eddie J. Izzard
Tell
Didn
Transvestite
Kids
Transvestites
Thought
Puberty
School
Sticks
Wells
Kill
Might
Cause
Well
Causes

More quotes by Eddie Izzard

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If you go down as a comedian's comedian, that's basically meaning other comedians are hopefully feeling that you're doing okay.
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Scrabble was invented by Nazis to piss off kids with dyslexia. This is true, they proved this one. The word dyslexia was invented by Nazis to piss off kids with dyslexia.
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I am someone who's very positive about business, as a social Democrat. I do like the safety net of the welfare system and people setting things and creating business, and that's what I try to do with my own work: export it around the world from the U.K.
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You have the American dream! The dream is to be born in a gutter and grow up, and then get all the money in the world and stick it in your ears and go THBBBBBT.
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I try to just talk about human stories and what I think about religion or teapots or whatever.
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My Gran said put a thimble on your finger and it helps you in case you slip with the needle and it goes up, into the brain, and death.
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So in Europe, we had empires. Everyone had them - France and Spain and Britain and Turkey! The Ottoman Empire, full of furniture for some reason. And the Austro-Hungarian Empire, famous for f-k all! Yes, all they did was slowly collapse like a flan in a cupboard.
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America is the new Roman Empire. Remember what happened to Rome.
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Guns don't kill people, people kill people, and monkeys do too (if they have a gun).
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For me to put a look together, if it's going to be a boy look or a girl look or whatever, is quite a tricky thing to do. I'm not doing drag because drag is seen in a certain way and my comedy has got zero to do with what I'm wearing. I could wear an elephant suit and say the same thing.
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Everyone gets cards at the beginning of life. I am transgender, I decided to be honest and tell everyone about it, and that's it.
Eddie Izzard
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I don't believe in God. So I'm a non-believer in the non-visible. I'm a believer in us in humans.
Eddie Izzard
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If you get anything creative going, then the work and play thing is the same thing, I feel.
Eddie Izzard
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If you think about determination, if people have a heart and are determined, they can get to that place. But there are a lot of negative people who were enormously determined. All the Nazis were determined. They wanted to murder everyone. Everyone with a bad heart, who doesn't care about people, I wish they hadn't started.
Eddie Izzard
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In the UK a lot of people don't like to try. There's a different cultural thing. Here [in USA] if you try and fail, you get up again and start again and keep going. People respect you for it. Even if you keep failing, they respect the tenacity.
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All humans can do more than they think they can do. So I think we can all actually be more superhuman than we think we can.
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I appreciate your applause, but I don't do it for applause. I do it for cash, it's much better.
Eddie Izzard
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That's no good, I can't steal from the fairly well off and give to the moderately impoverished! That's not gonna swing, is it?
Eddie Izzard
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Before birds get sucked into jet engines, do they ever think, Is that Rod Stewart in first class?
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Scrabble was invented by Nazis to piss off kids with dyslexia.
Eddie Izzard