Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
Some people are widely read. I'm thinly read.
Eddie Izzard
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
Eddie Izzard
Age: 62
Born: 1962
Born: February 7
Actor
Comedian
Improviser
Politician
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Edward John Izzard
Eddie John Izzard
Edward Jonathan Izzard
Eddie Jonathan Izzard
Edward Izzard
Edward J. Izzard
Eddie J. Izzard
Thinly
Widely
Read
People
More quotes by Eddie Izzard
I don't believe in God. So I'm a non-believer in the non-visible. I'm a believer in us in humans.
Eddie Izzard
Performance enhancing drugs are banned in the Olympics. OK, we can swing with that. But performance 'debilitating' drugs should not be banned. Smoke a joint and win the 100 metres, fair play for you. That's pretty good. Unless someone's dangling a Mars bar off in the distance.
Eddie Izzard
If you're choking in a restaurant you can just say the magic words, 'Heimlich maneuver,' and all will be well. Trouble is, it's difficult to say 'Heimlich maneuver' when you're choking to death.
Eddie Izzard
So in Europe, we had empires. Everyone had them - France and Spain and Britain and Turkey! The Ottoman Empire, full of furniture for some reason. And the Austro-Hungarian Empire, famous for f-k all! Yes, all they did was slowly collapse like a flan in a cupboard.
Eddie Izzard
I don't know what it's like in the U.S. but immigrants in the U.K. do the jobs the citizens won't do.
Eddie Izzard
My Gran said put a thimble on your finger and it helps you in case you slip with the needle and it goes up, into the brain, and death.
Eddie Izzard
I wanna live 'til I die, no more, no less.
Eddie Izzard
They tend to come out a colour called 'Pants left in wash'
Eddie Izzard
All humans can do more than they think they can do. So I think we can all actually be more superhuman than we think we can.
Eddie Izzard
But puberty was... well, before puberty, at school, I didn't tell kids I was a transvestite 'cause I thought they might kill me with sticks, you know?
Eddie Izzard
If you get anything creative going, then the work and play thing is the same thing, I feel.
Eddie Izzard
Before birds get sucked into jet engines, do they ever think, Is that Rod Stewart in first class?
Eddie Izzard
Sharks are just evil bastards. I'm quite happy if all the sharks just went, because they eat fish and us. And we need the fish.
Eddie Izzard
Horseshoes are lucky. Horses have four bits of lucky nailed to their feet. They should be the luckiest animals in the world. They should rule the country. They should win all their horse races, at least. 'In the fifth race today, every single horse was first equal...one horse threw a shoe came in third...the duck was ninth...and five ran.'
Eddie Izzard
So the American government lied to the Native Americans for many, many years, and then President Clinton lied about a relationship, and everyone was surprised! A little naive, I feel!
Eddie Izzard
Guns don't kill people, people kill people, and monkeys do too (if they have a gun).
Eddie Izzard
Danger could be my middle name... But it's John.
Eddie Izzard
I don't believe in God. I believe gods and devils are within us. It's our own battle. Our life's battle is to appeal to the gods within us, and to fight the devils within us.
Eddie Izzard
Fox hunting, there's big fox hunting thing, there's arguments in Britain about fox hunting. And they go around. They obviously hunt foxes because the foxes, they attack chickens. And posh people have an alliance with chickens just like in the First World War.
Eddie Izzard
You’ve got to believe you can be a standup before you can be a standup. You have to believe you can act before you can act. You have to believe you can be an astronaut before you can be an astronaut. You’ve got to believe.
Eddie Izzard