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I try to just talk about human stories and what I think about religion or teapots or whatever.
Eddie Izzard
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Eddie Izzard
Age: 62
Born: 1962
Born: February 7
Actor
Comedian
Improviser
Politician
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Edward John Izzard
Eddie John Izzard
Edward Jonathan Izzard
Eddie Jonathan Izzard
Edward Izzard
Edward J. Izzard
Eddie J. Izzard
Whatever
Religion
Stories
Human
Humans
Trying
Think
Teapots
Thinking
Talk
More quotes by Eddie Izzard
They tend to come out a colour called 'Pants left in wash'
Eddie Izzard
If you get too well-known, you can never be a comedian's comedian, it just won't sit well. But I'm fine with that. I'm fine with that label.
Eddie Izzard
If you get anything creative going, then the work and play thing is the same thing, I feel.
Eddie Izzard
That's no good, I can't steal from the fairly well off and give to the moderately impoverished! That's not gonna swing, is it?
Eddie Izzard
MAC gave me 55 lipsticks to test. These are the same lipsticks I got caught stealing by the police when I was 15. How ironic.
Eddie Izzard
I appreciate your applause, but I don't do it for applause. I do it for cash, it's much better.
Eddie Izzard
Sharks are just evil bastards. I'm quite happy if all the sharks just went, because they eat fish and us. And we need the fish.
Eddie Izzard
There's a thing about trying too hard, which I think is in all forms, which is if you really try to do things really well, you can get to a less good place than if you just let go and let it fly. Especially in creativity.
Eddie Izzard
If you think about determination, if people have a heart and are determined, they can get to that place. But there are a lot of negative people who were enormously determined. All the Nazis were determined. They wanted to murder everyone. Everyone with a bad heart, who doesn't care about people, I wish they hadn't started.
Eddie Izzard
Fox hunting, there's big fox hunting thing, there's arguments in Britain about fox hunting. And they go around. They obviously hunt foxes because the foxes, they attack chickens. And posh people have an alliance with chickens just like in the First World War.
Eddie Izzard
I wanna live 'til I die, no more, no less.
Eddie Izzard
What was the first cat that talked a human into putting a cat door in?
Eddie Izzard
Performance enhancing drugs are banned in the Olympics. OK, we can swing with that. But performance 'debilitating' drugs should not be banned. Smoke a joint and win the 100 metres, fair play for you. That's pretty good. Unless someone's dangling a Mars bar off in the distance.
Eddie Izzard
Two languages in one brain? No one can live at that speed!
Eddie Izzard
I'd like to have sex with myself.
Eddie Izzard
It's my manifest destiny to wear a skirt in all countries.
Eddie Izzard
My Gran said put a thimble on your finger and it helps you in case you slip with the needle and it goes up, into the brain, and death.
Eddie Izzard
We must have been hunters and gatherers but some of us were just waiters and hopers.
Eddie Izzard
I saw something in a program on something in Miami, and they were saying, We've redecorated this building to how it looked over 50 years ago! And people were going, No, surely not, no. No one was alive then.
Eddie Izzard
But puberty was... well, before puberty, at school, I didn't tell kids I was a transvestite 'cause I thought they might kill me with sticks, you know?
Eddie Izzard
