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An exhaustive study of police records shows that no woman has ever shot her husband while he was doing the dishes.

Earl Wilson

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Earl Wilson
Age: 79 †
Born: 1907
Born: May 3
Died: 1987
Died: January 16
Journalist
Writer
St. Louis
Missouri
Husband
Records
Study
Woman
Exhaustive
Shows
Dishes
Women
Shot
Ever
Police
Shots

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Saying 'Gesundheit' doesn't really help the common cold - but its about as good as anything the doctors have come up with.
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Gossip is when you hear something you like about someone you don't.
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Women's liberation will not be achieved until a woman can become paunchy and bald and still think she's attractive to the opposite sex.
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This is the age of bargain hunters. If it had been this way in biblical times, we'd probably have been offered another commandment free if we had accepted the first ten.
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Middle Age - later than you think and sooner than you expect.
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Modern man drives a mortgaged car over a bond-financed highway on credit-card gas.
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Nonchalance is the ability to remain down to earth when everything else is up in the air.
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Today's accent may be on youth, but the stress is still on the parents.
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Ever notice that the whisper of temptation can be heard farther than the loudest call to duty.
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Mathematics-a wonderful science, but it hasn't yet come up with a way to divide one tricycle between three small boys.
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A bachelor is a guy who leans toward women - but not far enough to lose his balance.
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Feminists say 60 percent of the country's wealth is in the hands of women. They're letting men hold the other 40 percent because their handbags are full.
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Money in the bank is like toothpaste in the tube. Easy to take out, hard to put back.
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If you wouldn't write it and sign it, don't say it.
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The man who didn't want his wife to work has been succeeded by the man who asks about her chances of getting a raise.
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To sell something, tell a woman it's a bargain tell a man it's deductible.
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One way to get high blood pressure is to go mountain climbing over molehills.
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A baseball game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings.
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Science may never come up with a better office communication system than the coffee break.
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Snow and adolescence are the only problems that disappear if you ignore them long enough.
Earl Wilson