Quote

I'm not drunk onstage, although I've done that a couple of times when I was younger. It's partly just the way I talk - I talk like somebody in a rocking chair. I'm your 150-year-old grandmother.

Dylan Moran

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Dylan Moran
Age: 53
Born: 1971
Born: November 3
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Dylan William Moran
Years
Drunk
Way
Although
Rocking
Like
Couple
Onstage
Somebody
Partly
Year
Chair
Talk
Chairs
Times
Grandmother
Done
Younger

More quotes by Dylan Moran

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You try various things when you're growing up. I was an attache in the Foreign Service for a while and then I drove a bulldozer, but neither of those panned out for me so it had to be stand-up.
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You achieve the surreal jokes through the realism by making it elastic.
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I'll have to look into [Washington] D.C. a bit more. I know it's given over to the administration and the bureaucracy connected to it. It's a super-organism of the American state. But there's also a parallel city in there where normal people live.
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If you're talking about crowd enthusiasm, it varies. I have a decent following in Australia so I like there. I'm interested in playing everywhere.
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I do not walk around imaging myself to be intimidating or smart.
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I think you should, yeah. You should wash your beard, then shave it off, nail it to a Frisbee and fling it over a rainbow.
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Two young, fit, healthy attractive people in love? There’s nothing worse to look at in the world.
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The East is very mysterious to Westerners. Even post-Cold War, it's still an unknown entity.
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I dont watch a whole lot of stand up. Mainly I prefer to read writers they make me laugh the most. Something gets you when youre alone and someones voice is coming through their work. Theres a different quality to it that stays with you a bit more.
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Paper acts as an eraser on the mind, as soon as you look at what you've written.
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In the same way, there is some creature gnawing away inside of me, urging me to do things in different ways.
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You cannot over estimate how infantile men are about sex! Men are people that have sex BECAUSE they have a headache... or are on fire, or have been shot in the head, or whatever it is!
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It's true that I have spoken about doing a book before, but then everyone you speak to is planning to write a book.
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I'll work for whoever wants to hire me. Even the jewelry channel.
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The trend now is to get away from stage bound sitcoms.
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America's work ethic is non-stop it's not even enshrined in law that workers have to get their two weeks holiday money. But Americans work harder than everyone else I can think of.
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If you're a comic, you don't have a rehearsal room, you rehearse on stage. My main concern is remembering everything.
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You should be as alive as you can, until you're totally dead!
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Religion is the yeast of death cakes. It is the most awful agent on a vulnerable mind. It's the refuge of alienated and lonely people. It's what people had before television. It yokes people together into an imaginary world. It is just people talking to their imaginary friends, at length. I wouldn't mind, but some of the people are world leaders.
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He could dismiss several schools of philosophy by shifting slightly in his chair or toting his whisky glass.
Dylan Moran