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Fruit... it's just God showing off. Look at all the colours I know!

Dylan Moran

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Dylan Moran
Age: 53
Born: 1971
Born: November 3
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Dylan William Moran
Look
Looks
Colours
Showing
Colour
Fruit
Humor
Funny

More quotes by Dylan Moran

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I've lived in the UK for longer than I lived in Ireland. I'm not worried about myself, but it's ridiculous for youngsters.
Dylan Moran
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There's always a host of voices you're inspired by. I love Don DeLillo, and I love Isaac Bashevis Singer, and I love Beckett, and I love Pinter. He's one of the funniest voices in English literature since Dickens.
Dylan Moran
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Then you get these articles about how unhealthy life is in the city. You know mobile phone tumours - far more likely in the city. Well you know what, so is everything else! Including sex, coffee and conversation.
Dylan Moran
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The measure of a conversation is how much mutual recognition there is in it how much shared there is in it. If you're talking about what's in your own head, or without thought to what people looking and listening will feel, you might as well be in a room talking to yourself.
Dylan Moran
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America's work ethic is non-stop it's not even enshrined in law that workers have to get their two weeks holiday money. But Americans work harder than everyone else I can think of.
Dylan Moran
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Wow this place is really big isn't it? They must do proper stuff here, like opera and all that...shite.
Dylan Moran
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Why do I even dare to think I could dream I could imagine I could hope?!
Dylan Moran
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I do pauses, pauses work for me
Dylan Moran
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You know what you are? You're a beard with an idiot hanging off it.
Dylan Moran
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I've seen stand up comedy, and after a while you start to notice that a lot of people are doing things that are like a lot of other people. There can be a bit of a herd mentality, and that's obviously less interesting because there's less going on. I'm just being totally frank with you.
Dylan Moran
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You’re not an adult at all - you're just a tall child holding a beer, having conversations you don't understand...
Dylan Moran
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You know it's a sad day when your child looks at you and asks 'Daddy, are these organic?'
Dylan Moran
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When did you ever hear of a child not in need? 'Oh that's enough jam tart for me, I'll just go now and clean the toilets.'
Dylan Moran
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My drive to put myself on the line comes from boredom. From that feeling when you go to bed and think, 'What did I do today?' It doesn't have to be something monumental, just a feeling that you really tried to look at something, or look into something.
Dylan Moran
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You can't please everyone, nor should you seek to, because then you won't please anyone, least of all yourself.
Dylan Moran
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I don't have lungs anymore! Just two spare bags that flew in under a bridge one day.
Dylan Moran
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If you covered a broom handle with oil and shoved it up my arse, then put me on a trampoline, in a lift, I could write a better song on the walls.
Dylan Moran
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You're supposed to eat the cows. They're great big lumbering stupid things - they'd be everywhere if we didn't eat them.
Dylan Moran
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I did throw a lot of eggs into one basket, as you do in your teenage years - 'I am buying these records, I am wearing this'. I did quite a bit of that. You have to do it, wear your stupid shoes, wear your stupid hair.
Dylan Moran
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I don't want to do the same thing over and over again.
Dylan Moran