Quote

You're supposed to eat the cows. They're great big lumbering stupid things - they'd be everywhere if we didn't eat them.

Dylan Moran

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Dylan Moran
Age: 53
Born: 1971
Born: November 3
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Dylan William Moran
Supposed
Humor
Stupid
Funny
Bigs
Didn
Lumbering
Great
Cows
Things
Everywhere

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Two young, fit, healthy attractive people in love? There’s nothing worse to look at in the world.
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You’re not an adult at all - you're just a tall child holding a beer, having conversations you don't understand...
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I grew up in a house where there was lots of teasing and language play and laughter it was very important. When I was a teenager, you wouldn't go to a bar and find lots of televisions everywhere. People were talking. Talk was the mental fire you would gather around in the evening. It occupied a big part of your existence.
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If I hadn't done this I might have ended up digging the roads.
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All the shy people are doomed! Natural selection favors the loud and the aggressive
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You've a very important, early decision to make in your life: are you going to be alone, or are you going to be with somebody else? Are you going to be sane, or not lonely? A couple is a strange thing it's an organism that's half as intelligent as the most intelligent member. And you both know who it is!
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Then you get these articles about how unhealthy life is in the city. You know mobile phone tumours - far more likely in the city. Well you know what, so is everything else! Including sex, coffee and conversation.
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[Washington] is the political capital. It's essentially a big office.
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Wow this place is really big isn't it? They must do proper stuff here, like opera and all that...shite.
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In the same way, there is some creature gnawing away inside of me, urging me to do things in different ways.
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We are both drawn to surreal situations so the writing was a joy.
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You achieve the surreal jokes through the realism by making it elastic.
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He could dismiss several schools of philosophy by shifting slightly in his chair or toting his whisky glass.
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You know it's a sad day when your child looks at you and asks 'Daddy, are these organic?'
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I don't go around thinking of myself as a great anything.
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I'm not drunk onstage, although I've done that a couple of times when I was younger. It's partly just the way I talk - I talk like somebody in a rocking chair. I'm your 150-year-old grandmother.
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If you covered a broom handle with oil and shoved it up my arse, then put me on a trampoline, in a lift, I could write a better song on the walls.
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When did you ever hear of a child not in need? 'Oh that's enough jam tart for me, I'll just go now and clean the toilets.'
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Irish people give big hellos and very little goodbyes. Unless they're female, and then they spend five hours talking in the doorway to the person that's leaving their house.
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If you're talking about crowd enthusiasm, it varies. I have a decent following in Australia so I like there. I'm interested in playing everywhere.
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