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Look at his face. I bet his cornflakes try to crawl out of the bowl.
Dylan Moran
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Dylan Moran
Age: 52
Born: 1971
Born: November 3
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Dylan William Moran
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Cornflakes
Looks
Crawl
Trying
Bowl
Bowls
Humor
Face
Faces
Funny
More quotes by Dylan Moran
The East is very mysterious to Westerners. Even post-Cold War, it's still an unknown entity.
Dylan Moran
America's work ethic is non-stop it's not even enshrined in law that workers have to get their two weeks holiday money. But Americans work harder than everyone else I can think of.
Dylan Moran
The truth is that I'm constitutionally incapable of doing an ordinary job.
Dylan Moran
I can't relax here. These people have no pubic hair anywhere. We have pubic hair on the ceiling.
Dylan Moran
Some people have told me that I'm grumpy it's not something that I'm aware of. It's not like I walk around poking children in the eye... not very small ones, anyway.
Dylan Moran
I’ve always been a big consumer of American journalism over the years and had an interest in the history of it and of the press in America how it has changed.
Dylan Moran
That's a rather flippant quote drinking and writing bad poetry from me. I mean, I said it, but I was doing other stuff too. I certainly didn't manage the full stretch of four years.
Dylan Moran
Fruit... it's just God showing off. Look at all the colours I know!
Dylan Moran
I have no qualifications to do anything else and there weren't any formal application forms you had to fill in for stand-up, so I thought I'd give that a twist.
Dylan Moran
I really can't describe what my stand-up is like - people see it and they say it's like that, or it's like this, and that's really up to them, that's fine, but I don't sit around all day analysing it. I just try and enjoy a show and interest myself because if I don't do that then I won't interest anybody else.
Dylan Moran
I'm not drunk onstage, although I've done that a couple of times when I was younger. It's partly just the way I talk - I talk like somebody in a rocking chair. I'm your 150-year-old grandmother.
Dylan Moran
I always try to address where I am. I'll talk to the people and try to find out what it is about that particular place that makes it distinct from everywhere else.
Dylan Moran
All the shy people are doomed! Natural selection favors the loud and the aggressive
Dylan Moran
Kids, they are always hurting themselves. It's like, Quick, get me to casualty quick! while your doing something important like sitting down picking your ear.
Dylan Moran
I don't go to different countries to criticise their political system and tell them what they should be doing - what do I know?
Dylan Moran
Children are very overprotected now, in lots of ways. We're very nervous about them. You know, people go, Don't go outside! Or inside! Get into the cupboard with some spinach! When I was a child they'd kick you out and you weren't expected to come back until there were bats!
Dylan Moran
You can't please everyone, nor should you seek to, because then you won't please anyone, least of all yourself.
Dylan Moran
Now I'm not an expert at mathematics, but I calculated it would take at least three of me to take on one third of one of them, even if they were attacking me with just their arse.
Dylan Moran
You can see desperation in people who are too eager to laugh because they're in such a hurry not to look at what's confronting them in their lives and that's kind of sad because there's a kind of pornographic aspect to it, of making some sort of pain go away, of hovering around a pain, making yourself numb, not feel anything.
Dylan Moran
I quite fancy the 1940s. I like the trams and the trousers.
Dylan Moran
