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I'm fascinated by how you'll change your position so many times over a lifetime, but really what you're doing is occupying a series of positions on a landscape.
Dylan Moran
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Dylan Moran
Age: 53
Born: 1971
Born: November 3
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Dylan William Moran
Position
Times
Change
Occupying
Many
Positions
Really
Fascinated
Landscape
Lifetime
Series
More quotes by Dylan Moran
You can laugh at somebody because they are innocent, and because they are naive or they are about to walk into a wall, but if somebody's giving you stuff, if somebody's talking, giving you their take on things, what makes you laugh, generally speaking, is going to be somebody who is telling it in an angry way.
Dylan Moran
I'll work for whoever wants to hire me. Even the jewelry channel.
Dylan Moran
Kids, they are always hurting themselves. It's like, Quick, get me to casualty quick! while your doing something important like sitting down picking your ear.
Dylan Moran
America is this incredible mosaic of immigrants, so people really want to be anchored in some kind of culture as well as the one they are living in.
Dylan Moran
I dont watch a whole lot of stand up. Mainly I prefer to read writers they make me laugh the most. Something gets you when youre alone and someones voice is coming through their work. Theres a different quality to it that stays with you a bit more.
Dylan Moran
A lot of the fiction I read growing up was post-war American, and not all of it centers on Manhattan, but around people of the Mad Men generation, people like John Cheever and, in more modern times, Don DeLillo, who I always mention.
Dylan Moran
You try various things when you're growing up. I was an attache in the Foreign Service for a while and then I drove a bulldozer, but neither of those panned out for me so it had to be stand-up.
Dylan Moran
You cannot over estimate how infantile men are about sex! Men are people that have sex BECAUSE they have a headache... or are on fire, or have been shot in the head, or whatever it is!
Dylan Moran
The truth is that I'm constitutionally incapable of doing an ordinary job.
Dylan Moran
I think you should, yeah. You should wash your beard, then shave it off, nail it to a Frisbee and fling it over a rainbow.
Dylan Moran
Tequila? It's not even a drink. It's a way for having the cops around without using a phone.
Dylan Moran
I don't go to different countries to criticise their political system and tell them what they should be doing - what do I know?
Dylan Moran
I wanted to show off - a simple impulse or drive in much the same way as some kids wanted to play football, I wanted to show off. Not complicated in that sense, very natural it just depends on how you want to show off.
Dylan Moran
He could dismiss several schools of philosophy by shifting slightly in his chair or toting his whisky glass.
Dylan Moran
Women are like canoes, full of soup. At first everyone is suspicious but then everyone wants one.
Dylan Moran
I don't have lungs anymore! Just two spare bags that flew in under a bridge one day.
Dylan Moran
If you're a comic, you don't have a rehearsal room, you rehearse on stage. My main concern is remembering everything.
Dylan Moran
I feel very very old. My hair hurts. I have buttocks all over my body and I can't even smoke properly any more. I don't have lungs, I just have two poppadoms in here.
Dylan Moran
There's always a host of voices you're inspired by. I love Don DeLillo, and I love Isaac Bashevis Singer, and I love Beckett, and I love Pinter. He's one of the funniest voices in English literature since Dickens.
Dylan Moran
Children are very overprotected now, in lots of ways. We're very nervous about them. You know, people go, Don't go outside! Or inside! Get into the cupboard with some spinach! When I was a child they'd kick you out and you weren't expected to come back until there were bats!
Dylan Moran