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I'm organised in some ways, but not in others.

Dylan Moran

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Dylan Moran
Age: 53
Born: 1971
Born: November 3
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Dylan William Moran
Ways
Others
Way
Organised

More quotes by Dylan Moran

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Shame is one of the greatest aphrodisiacs in the world, anyway, built into religion.
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That's a rather flippant quote drinking and writing bad poetry from me. I mean, I said it, but I was doing other stuff too. I certainly didn't manage the full stretch of four years.
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Eggs! They're not a food, they belong in no group! They're just farts clothed in substance!
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I'm quite a compulsive person-I only worked this out recently - I'm compulsive, but I'm also very indecisive. I don't know what I want, but I know that I want it now.
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I have no qualifications to do anything else and there weren't any formal application forms you had to fill in for stand-up, so I thought I'd give that a twist.
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I did throw a lot of eggs into one basket, as you do in your teenage years - 'I am buying these records, I am wearing this'. I did quite a bit of that. You have to do it, wear your stupid shoes, wear your stupid hair.
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Because their bones are growing, they can only sleep in certain positions, obviously. The crucifix and the swastika tend to be the most popular. Sometimes a combination of the two.
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America's work ethic is non-stop it's not even enshrined in law that workers have to get their two weeks holiday money. But Americans work harder than everyone else I can think of.
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You know what you are? You're a beard with an idiot hanging off it.
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You know it's a sad day when your child looks at you and asks 'Daddy, are these organic?'
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I dont watch a whole lot of stand up. Mainly I prefer to read writers they make me laugh the most. Something gets you when youre alone and someones voice is coming through their work. Theres a different quality to it that stays with you a bit more.
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In the same way, there is some creature gnawing away inside of me, urging me to do things in different ways.
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I can't relax here. These people have no pubic hair anywhere. We have pubic hair on the ceiling.
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Two young, fit, healthy attractive people in love? There’s nothing worse to look at in the world.
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Wow this place is really big isn't it? They must do proper stuff here, like opera and all that...shite.
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I think a lot of the time you just parody yourself.
Dylan Moran
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One thing that's coming up a lot is: are you as grumpy as you appear from this Black Books thing.
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I always try to address where I am. I'll talk to the people and try to find out what it is about that particular place that makes it distinct from everywhere else.
Dylan Moran
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You know, just sometimes, in between the first cigarette with coffee in the morning to that four hundredth glass of cornershop piss at 3am, you do sometimes look at yourself and think...This is fantastic. I'm in heaven.
Dylan Moran
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I enjoy performing, always, but when you're taping a gig, you've got to blank out this mass apparatus of self-consciousness that's surrounding you, this invitation to drown in self-consciousness. Otherwise you just won't be able to do anything.
Dylan Moran