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Oh how I hate you. I hate you so much it gives me energy. I have to get up early in the morning just to hate you, because there's not enough time in the day! Please GO AWAY!
Dylan Moran
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Dylan Moran
Age: 53
Born: 1971
Born: November 3
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Dylan William Moran
Time
Morning
Funny
Hate
Energy
Away
Early
Enough
Please
Giving
Gives
Much
Humor
More quotes by Dylan Moran
In the same way, there is some creature gnawing away inside of me, urging me to do things in different ways.
Dylan Moran
You know, just sometimes, in between the first cigarette with coffee in the morning to that four hundredth glass of cornershop piss at 3am, you do sometimes look at yourself and think...This is fantastic. I'm in heaven.
Dylan Moran
What are children anyway? Midget drunks. They greet you in the morning by kneeing you in the face and talking gibberish. They can't even walk straight.
Dylan Moran
I have used that song [50ft Queenie] and I'm a big PJ Harvey fan. I think she's fantastic.
Dylan Moran
You know what you are? You're a beard with an idiot hanging off it.
Dylan Moran
Religion is the yeast of death cakes. It is the most awful agent on a vulnerable mind. It's the refuge of alienated and lonely people. It's what people had before television. It yokes people together into an imaginary world. It is just people talking to their imaginary friends, at length. I wouldn't mind, but some of the people are world leaders.
Dylan Moran
I never really had a career, to be honest with you. I never in my life sat down and planned it. I have thought, 'Oh, I'd like to do this,' like anybody would. But I'm not the type that says, 'If I do this, it will lead to that.'
Dylan Moran
The characters can't be wittier than people are in real life. They have to be character witty.
Dylan Moran
Shame is one of the greatest aphrodisiacs in the world, anyway, built into religion.
Dylan Moran
There's always a host of voices you're inspired by. I love Don DeLillo, and I love Isaac Bashevis Singer, and I love Beckett, and I love Pinter. He's one of the funniest voices in English literature since Dickens.
Dylan Moran
Money can't buy you love, but it can get you some really good chocolate ginger biscuits.
Dylan Moran
The truth is that I'm constitutionally incapable of doing an ordinary job.
Dylan Moran
I don't go to different countries to criticise their political system and tell them what they should be doing - what do I know?
Dylan Moran
I'm just trying to understand what's around me as much as anyone else is, really. To draw a bead on a moving target.
Dylan Moran
I don't go around thinking of myself as a great anything.
Dylan Moran
You’re not an adult at all - you're just a tall child holding a beer, having conversations you don't understand...
Dylan Moran
I know there's similar dissatisfaction in America. There's a lot of white people who come from blue collar backgrounds and who feel ill-equipped and badly served by modern economics and the modern job market.
Dylan Moran
If I hadn't done this I might have ended up digging the roads.
Dylan Moran
I thought The Office was good, though I didn't think of it as a sitcom, just as a very good programme.
Dylan Moran
We are both drawn to surreal situations so the writing was a joy.
Dylan Moran
