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My cranky cardiologist says I'm destined to die in the kitchen.

Drew Carey

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Drew Carey
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: May 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Improviser
Photographer
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Cleveland
Ohio
Drew Allison Carey
Kitchen
Says
Dies
Cardiologist
Cranky
Destined

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I don't think there's hardly a comic out there that does clean material all the way around. There's a couple of guys that are clean, but I'm not one of them.
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It doesn't matter how smart you are to audition for 'Jeopardy,' you just have to luck out and know what they're asking you that day.
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I don't run outside, honestly. Sometimes I go out around my house, but mainly it's the stupid treadmill. I wish I had a better answer, but I'm very businesslike about my runs.
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If you're wearing a Bluetooth thing and you've got that thing on your belt, you are working for somebody else. You are not the guy in charge. That's a really good social status indicator.
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Why is everybody afraid of going to Heaven? You want to be here with the smog and the sin and bad people and the war? Or do you want to be in Heaven, sitting next to Jesus, you know?
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I'm a big believer in overcoming and achieving and doing things and not feeling sorry for yourself.
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Reality shows always look for the worst people.
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The best thing about Las Vegas is that no one pretends to be responsible for your behavior like they do in the rest of the country. There's no meddling self-righteous liberals or right-wing Christian demagogues telling you that you can't do something fun with your own time and money. If you can afford it, it's yours.
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When I did Comic Relief, I did it to be on the show it's a badge of honor as a comedian to do that show.
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And for you kids watching at home, remember, the less homework you do and the closer you sit to the TV, the more points you get.
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The Marines gave me a really strong sense of discipline and a work ethic that kicks in at my job.
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I was in the band when I was a kid, I played the trumpet.
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If I wasn't a comic or TV star, I really wanted to be a photojournalist.
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I don't care if my jokes are appropriate for a kid.
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What good is democracy if you can't get what you want?
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I'm competitive at everything.
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In any other job, they're truck drivers. In show-biz, they're Transportation Captains.
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I work with a place in Santa Monica called Phase IV. My doctor recommended them to me when I started losing weight. They help people train for things like triathlons or biking and running races. They offer physical therapists, testing, lectures.
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