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I don't care if my jokes are appropriate for a kid.
Drew Carey
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Drew Carey
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: May 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Improviser
Photographer
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Cleveland
Ohio
Drew Allison Carey
Appropriate
Jokes
Kids
Care
More quotes by Drew Carey
It sucks being fat, you know.
Drew Carey
I tried out for 'Jeopardy' once, when they came to Cleveland, but I didn't make it.
Drew Carey
Things don't make me nearly as happy as talking and having a beer with my friends. And that's something everyone can do.
Drew Carey
Learn how to set goals. That's the key to everything. That includes designing your own success. You define what the goal is, it's not somebody else's goal, it's yours.
Drew Carey
The first Monopoly game I played with my brothers, I hated losing so much, I just had to beat them.
Drew Carey
We'll never see national shows with 45 shares again.
Drew Carey
I don't run outside, honestly. Sometimes I go out around my house, but mainly it's the stupid treadmill. I wish I had a better answer, but I'm very businesslike about my runs.
Drew Carey
Listen, you don't know any better so I'll just tell you. You can't try to save money by not having the right beer. You know, you can skip having medical insurance, you can buy everything you own at a swap meet but the right beer is what makes living like this possible.
Drew Carey
I remember when I took a temp job... so I got a job at a department store. Something temporary to put on my resume, my parents said. Yeah... till I die!
Drew Carey
I wish I could end every rap song I didn't like with a buzzer.
Drew Carey
Yeah, apparently chasing a bus uses different muscles than sitting and eating.
Drew Carey
I never thought I was a libertarian until I picked up Reason magazine and realized I agree with everything they had printed.
Drew Carey
I'm a big believer in overcoming and achieving and doing things and not feeling sorry for yourself.
Drew Carey
I'm never afraid to die. I think that's the best thing that can happen to somebody is they get to move on and do something better.
Drew Carey
Nothing's funny about someone who's successful.
Drew Carey
Like I said, all comedy is based on exaggeration, big or small, whatever you can get away with.
Drew Carey
I was in the band when I was a kid, I played the trumpet.
Drew Carey
I just liked stand-up comedy so much. I used to memorize Bill Cosby albums and other people's albums, George Carlin, Flip Wilson.
Drew Carey
It should be up to each bar owner and patron to decide if they want to smoke or not.
Drew Carey
The economy is in trouble, schools are in trouble, and people have been leaving the city in droves for a long, long time.
Drew Carey