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I don't care if my jokes are appropriate for a kid.

Drew Carey

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Drew Carey
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: May 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Improviser
Photographer
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Cleveland
Ohio
Drew Allison Carey
Care
Appropriate
Jokes
Kids

More quotes by Drew Carey

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In any other job, they're truck drivers. In show-biz, they're Transportation Captains.
Drew Carey
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Just because a guy has a shaved head, pierced nipples, and doesn't have sex with women doesn't make him gay. It just makes him down on his luck.
Drew Carey
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But I don't want to lose touch with things like eating in Bob's Big Boy.
Drew Carey
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Boy, a drive-through liquor store. God bless America! A place where you can drive through and buy whiskey, beer... just the thing for that drunk driver who's constantly on the go. Cant stop now! I've got places to go, people to hit!
Drew Carey
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I'm down to earth people sense that and they appreciate it.
Drew Carey
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The first Monopoly game I played with my brothers, I hated losing so much, I just had to beat them.
Drew Carey
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Why is everybody afraid of going to Heaven? You want to be here with the smog and the sin and bad people and the war? Or do you want to be in Heaven, sitting next to Jesus, you know?
Drew Carey
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As far as exercising goes... watch for my next book, How I died while Jogging.
Drew Carey
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When I'm working, I'm going to avoid all media. No newspapers, no magazines, no movies, no radio, no TV. I'm just going to do creative work.
Drew Carey
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Reality shows always look for the worst people.
Drew Carey
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I tried out for 'Jeopardy' once, when they came to Cleveland, but I didn't make it.
Drew Carey
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Libertarians are essentially what the Republicans were 30 years ago. Abraham Lincoln, Teddy Roosevelt, Richard Nixon, Ronald Reagan. They'd all fit more under the Libertarian label than the modern day Republican label.
Drew Carey
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International soccer has been a big part of my love for the sport. I love the Men's National Team. I can say that they're my favorite sports team.
Drew Carey
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I just liked stand-up comedy so much. I used to memorize Bill Cosby albums and other people's albums, George Carlin, Flip Wilson.
Drew Carey
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I was raised by just my mom. See, my father died when I was eight years old. At least, that's what he told us in the letter.
Drew Carey
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You say tomato, I say bourbon and coke.
Drew Carey
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George Carlin is kind of my template now because George Carlin before was straight laced regular comic and he had short hair, a tie, suit, nightclub guy. Then he said screw it, let his hair grow, just started telling what he thought was the truth. So that's what I'm trying to do.
Drew Carey
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I was in the band when I was a kid, I played the trumpet.
Drew Carey
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Nothing's funny about someone who's successful.
Drew Carey
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When I play poker, I don't like losing the pot.
Drew Carey