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Only bugs can truly appreciate the beauty of flowers.
Dov Davidoff
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Dov Davidoff
Appreciate
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More quotes by Dov Davidoff
I like shitty strip clubs. They look like what they are. I know what to expect. Unlike Congress, at least we know everybody is for sale.
Dov Davidoff
Someday I'd like to be a father, not of a human child, but something more reasonable.
Dov Davidoff
MTV has turned more young women into whores than poverty.
Dov Davidoff
Lack of sleep is only bad if you have to drive, or think, or talk, or move.
Dov Davidoff
Is there anything more attractive than a woman in high heels and low self esteem?
Dov Davidoff
When maintaining a relationship means diminishing your self, it's time to walk.
Dov Davidoff
People who say life is precious don't spend much time on line at the airport.
Dov Davidoff
Violence is never the answer, unless you don't feel like talking.
Dov Davidoff
How come the term 'threesome' is always used in a sexual context? What, nobody plays string instruments any more?
Dov Davidoff
A lot of people in a LA need to take a break from taking a break.
Dov Davidoff
Most public bathrooms now have automatic toilet sensors. People can't even be trusted to flush.
Dov Davidoff
Was thinking of taking a yoga class, then realized I wasn't gay. Whew. Close one.
Dov Davidoff
Being proud of your nationality is like congratulating yourself for inheriting money.
Dov Davidoff
What is sex addiction? I asked a doctor and the guys goes, Sex addiction... People will end up doing something they don't want to do just for sex. Isn't that called a first date, man? If sex was the result of something I wanted to do, there'd be condoms all over my PlayStation.
Dov Davidoff
Looking into blood doping. I think it will allow me to write jokes with greater intensity, and for a longer period of time.
Dov Davidoff
Flying first class means sitting next to a better class of person I don't want to talk to.
Dov Davidoff
My bedroom is so messy, if I died of natural causes, the cops would be like no he didn't, clearly there was a struggle.
Dov Davidoff
Learn to think for yourself, unless of course you can identify someone else with better judgement, and a flashlight.
Dov Davidoff
The language of love may be universal, but it's not one of the options on an ATM machine.
Dov Davidoff
It's a shame that physical beauty often has such a negative effect on its occupant.
Dov Davidoff