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It's a wonder you don't see the zebra being trotted out as a metaphor for racial harmony more often.

Dov Davidoff

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Dov Davidoff
Often
Trotted
Zebra
Zebras
Racial
Metaphor
Harmony
Wonder

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Few things are more annoying than too many of any one ethnicity in the same room.
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I've decided to retreat to the spirit world where I feel appreciated and understood.
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The downside of aging is a slower metabolism and achy joints.The upside is a knowledge of self that prevents one from behaving like a baboon.
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Every time I see someone taking care of a baby, I think why in the world would anyone willingly saddle themselves with that responsibility?
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Drugs in a disco are great for white people because it allows them to feel more Puerto Rican while dancing.
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People that say I'm really sensitive rarely are.
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I'd put my faith in god, but I haven't met him, and I've been hurt before.
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Why hasn't anyone opened a night club named 'No Drugs Allowed, Wink, Wink'?
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When cornered, a rattle snake can become so angry it's been known to bite itself, which is exactly how I feel in traffic and relationships.
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My job as a comedian is to heighten awareness about locally grown produce, fight factory farming, and promote euthanasia, but in a funny way.
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Is it a bad sign when you see the person you're dating and get the same feeling as if you just saw police lights in you're rear view mirror?
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Suicide is like the ejector button in the cockpit of an F-15. If life goes into a permanent tail spin, it's nice to know the option is there.
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My bedroom is so messy, if I died of natural causes, the cops would be like no he didn't, clearly there was a struggle.
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Few things are as uniquely painful as bad comedy, and the realization that the human mind is a house of mirrors with no entrance and no exit.
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If you hug someone goodbye and their response is what the hell are you doing? - you may want to examine you're definition of close friend.
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I would imagine that most of the people who consider themselves successful aren't, at least in the ways that really matter-myself included.
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