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Learn to think for yourself, unless of course you can identify someone else with better judgement, and a flashlight.

Dov Davidoff

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Dov Davidoff
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Writing good jokes requires effort. Think I'll just start dressing funnier.
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Hanging out with women on a platonic level is like spending time with someone from Europe. It's not better or worse, but it is different.
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Can you spare some change? is never a good pick up line.
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No one understands the way I feel about things I don't understand.
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I don't know if it's the economy, but finding work as a spiritual guru is really hard. Maybe I should grow my hair out.
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Gay men greet each other just like straight guys do... If one of the straight guys saved the other one's life.
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Few things are more annoying than too many of any one ethnicity in the same room.
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Maybe necrophiliacs are just people that want to have sex without a lot of talking.
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If I do marry, I'll expect a pretty serious dowry. I'm talking goats, pigs, chickens, the works.
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Being homeless is awful, but if you've ever tried to wrestle a duvet cover back onto a comforter you realise it's not without it's benefits.
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Statistically speaking, when a woman says I'm not going to have sex with you, she'll often have sex with you.
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America is a hot chick with a bad personality. Take her seriously and you'll end up hating yourself.
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Love is a crocodile just above the water line waiting to attack the innocent herbivore of my freedom.
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I think you have a lot to offer... not necessarily as a person, but as an organ donor.
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I would imagine that not having any potential could be less difficult than not fulfilling it.
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