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Learn to think for yourself, unless of course you can identify someone else with better judgement, and a flashlight.

Dov Davidoff

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Dov Davidoff
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Big black guys fear air travel almost as much as old white women fear big black guys.
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Cities with a black middle class provide the narrow minded an opportunity to realize that cultural differences are largely economic.
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The downside of aging is a slower metabolism and achy joints.The upside is a knowledge of self that prevents one from behaving like a baboon.
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No one understands the way I feel about things I don't understand.
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Please reduce the expectation in your tone when asking me how my day is going.
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Bad sign when the thought of your x-girlfriend sends you reeling in a search for new adjectives to describe stupidity and thoughtlessness?
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If only you understood the way I felt... it wouldn't help much because I don't really like you as a person.
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How come the term 'threesome' is always used in a sexual context? What, nobody plays string instruments any more?
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Not sure how I feel about reality. I'm going to begin purchasing stuffed animals and endowing them with the qualities people in my life lack.
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Violence is never the answer, unless you don't feel like talking.
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The human spirit is indomitable, unless your talking specifically about the people I know.
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You know you've lived in LA to long when what you fear most about prison is a lack of organic produce.
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I wonder if anybody ever decided to commit suicide, then thought but first I'm going to stop by that taco place I like so much.
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If I do marry, I'll expect a pretty serious dowry. I'm talking goats, pigs, chickens, the works.
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America has so much debt, if she were a person she'd need a co-signer to get a car loan.
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It's a wonder you don't see the zebra being trotted out as a metaphor for racial harmony more often.
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Comedy is rarely funny.
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Please use anger for something positive like hurting people that deserve it or writing jokes.
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Stop thanking god for your parking spot. He had nothing to do with it, and if he did, I want nothing to do with him.
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A picture is worth a thousand words, but conversations with them generally end in dissapointment.
Dov Davidoff