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Learn to think for yourself, unless of course you can identify someone else with better judgement, and a flashlight.

Dov Davidoff

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Dov Davidoff
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When rappers call each other son it leads me to believe they don't take fatherhood very seriously.
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Anticipation almost always exceeds the reality of that which we anticipated.
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Is it a bad sign when the thought of your x-girlfriend makes you say things like, Satan is a myth... I guess.
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I wish I could be attracted to unattractive women. They're just more interesting.
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I find anger so comforting. It's like a blanket made of unresolved issues, but it's a blanket none the less.
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Most public bathrooms now have automatic toilet sensors. People can't even be trusted to flush.
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Not sure how I feel about reality. I'm going to begin purchasing stuffed animals and endowing them with the qualities people in my life lack.
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America is a hot chick with a bad personality. Take her seriously and you'll end up hating yourself.
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Heard someone say children are god's gift to the world. What world are you referring to? And what's your definition of gift?
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Upside of being an attractive woman if you're remotely intelligent, people will treat you like you're brilliant. Downside: same thing.
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When I was a kid I remember thinking, if I had a girl, I would treat her really well. Little did I know, they don't always like that.
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Big black guys fear air travel almost as much as old white women fear big black guys.
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A lot of people in a LA need to take a break from taking a break.
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Life is fragile, unless your in the NFL in which case you'll need to wear padding.
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I wish that every other guy were gay. Think about the leverage that would create in your relationship.
Dov Davidoff
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Gotta get rid of these free radicals, but first I need to figure out what they are.
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We should create a holiday that celebrates money for what it is, essentially worthless paper, upon which we agree to pretend it has value.
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The good things in life are free, except for health care, and electricity.
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People increase their use of the term 'sir' when their angry. Little do they know, it only causes me to feel more like I'm wearing a top hat.
Dov Davidoff
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I've decided to become gay, not in a sexual way, but I am going to start picking up around the house.
Dov Davidoff