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Life is fragile, unless your in the NFL in which case you'll need to wear padding.

Dov Davidoff

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Dov Davidoff
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Living by the beach means feeling guilty about never going to the beach.
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The more I get to know people, the less I know about people.
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I wish that every other guy were gay. Think about the leverage that would create in your relationship.
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Laughing at ones own attempt at humor while saying things just come to me should be punishable by death.
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If only you understood the way I felt... it wouldn't help much because I don't really like you as a person.
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If you got it, flaunt it may be decent advice for prostitutes, but no one else.
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If you love sleep, you'll really enjoy death.
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A lot of people in a LA need to take a break from taking a break.
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Many television weather-women were one abusive parent away from prostitution.
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Just saw a woman with a t-shirt that said southern and sassy, it's all good. Well madame, I beg to differ, it is in fact, not 'all good'.
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The color red is associated with romance and blood, but not at the same time.
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I like shitty strip clubs. They look like what they are. I know what to expect. Unlike Congress, at least we know everybody is for sale.
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It's a wonder you don't see the zebra being trotted out as a metaphor for racial harmony more often.
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I think you have a lot to offer... not necessarily as a person, but as an organ donor.
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You know you've lived in LA to long when what you fear most about prison is a lack of organic produce.
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Horoscopes, like bad sitcoms, are created for people that I don't relate to.
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When being interviewed by a woman for a job, never begin with listen up doll face.
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If you hug someone goodbye and their response is what the hell are you doing? - you may want to examine you're definition of close friend.
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I'm neither professional fighter nor physicist, therefore on some level I will always consider myself a failure.
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