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Fear can be a great motivator, just not during foreplay.

Dov Davidoff

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Dov Davidoff
Foreplay
Motivator
Fear
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It's a wonder you don't see the zebra being trotted out as a metaphor for racial harmony more often.
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Being proud of your nationality is like congratulating yourself for inheriting money.
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Life is fragile, unless your in the NFL in which case you'll need to wear padding.
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The more I get to know people, the less I know about people.
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Women want a man who is sensitive, but god forbid you can't get it up after being frightened by a small woodland animal.
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Is there anything more attractive than a woman in high heels and low self esteem?
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No one understands the way I feel about things I don't understand.
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Looking into blood doping. I think it will allow me to write jokes with greater intensity, and for a longer period of time.
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The Statue of Liberty really is profound, I just wish she'd lighten up a bit.
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Hanging out with women on a platonic level is like spending time with someone from Europe. It's not better or worse, but it is different.
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I've never understood why anybody makes a big deal about mansions. It's just a house with more rooms. You still have to face yourself.
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The Nazis were well dressed. Today's racists are a rag-tag bunch with no sense of style or panache.
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Statistically speaking, when a woman says I'm not going to have sex with you, she'll often have sex with you.
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When rappers call each other son it leads me to believe they don't take fatherhood very seriously.
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If only St. Valentine was around to see his memory celebrated through the mindless marketing of whipping cream and lingerie.
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Cheerleaders are simultaneously everything that is right and wrong with the world.
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You know you've lived in LA to long when what you fear most about prison is a lack of organic produce.
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Health food would seem healthier if the people that sold it looked less unhealthy.
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Pine nuts pound for pound are more expensive than most varieties of smoked salmon. There I said it.
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How come the term 'threesome' is always used in a sexual context? What, nobody plays string instruments any more?
Dov Davidoff