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I've decided to retreat to the spirit world where I feel appreciated and understood.

Dov Davidoff

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Dov Davidoff
Retreat
Appreciated
Decided
Understood
Spirit
Feel
Feels
World

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You think you have anger issues? I just yelled at a sandwich. Not kidding.
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The language of love may be universal, but it's not one of the options on an ATM machine.
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Age is just a number, unless of course your trying to have a conversation with them.
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If only you understood the way I felt... it wouldn't help much because I don't really like you as a person.
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My job as a comedian is to heighten awareness about locally grown produce, fight factory farming, and promote euthanasia, but in a funny way.
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If you're an adult and still think material wealth leads to happiness, might I suggest not being a moron.
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Being anti-social can also mean that you're aware of how annoying it is to be social.
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I've decided to become gay, not in a sexual way, but I am going to start picking up around the house.
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You know you've lived in LA to long when what you fear most about prison is a lack of organic produce.
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A lot of people in a LA need to take a break from taking a break.
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Learn to think for yourself, unless of course you can identify someone else with better judgement, and a flashlight.
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Latin women enjoy being women more than other women.
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Brain damage and stupidity are very different things, but can have similar effects on the wearer.
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I would imagine that most of the people who consider themselves successful aren't, at least in the ways that really matter-myself included.
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Drugs in a disco are great for white people because it allows them to feel more Puerto Rican while dancing.
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Skin heads are doing an awful job of promoting racism. You guys need to loosen up, and for god's sake would it kill you to smile.
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If I do marry, I'll expect a pretty serious dowry. I'm talking goats, pigs, chickens, the works.
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My dad was old school Jewish. Not do your taxes Jewish - steal your car Jewish.
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I would imagine that not having any potential could be less difficult than not fulfilling it.
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Is there anything more attractive than a woman in high heels and low self esteem?
Dov Davidoff