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Looking into blood doping. I think it will allow me to write jokes with greater intensity, and for a longer period of time.

Dov Davidoff

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Dov Davidoff
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Cities with a black middle class provide the narrow minded an opportunity to realize that cultural differences are largely economic.
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I don't know if it's the economy, but finding work as a spiritual guru is really hard. Maybe I should grow my hair out.
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Is it a bad sign when you see the person you're dating and get the same feeling as if you just saw police lights in you're rear view mirror?
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I consider myself a patriot, but not for the traditional reasons. I'm just really passionate about apple pie.
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I find anger so comforting. It's like a blanket made of unresolved issues, but it's a blanket none the less.
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I would imagine that not having any potential could be less difficult than not fulfilling it.
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Hanging out with women on a platonic level is like spending time with someone from Europe. It's not better or worse, but it is different.
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Was thinking of taking a yoga class, then realized I wasn't gay. Whew. Close one.
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Few things interest me more than the things people don't say.
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When being interviewed by a woman for a job, never begin with listen up doll face.
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Do you ever have one of those weeks where you know nothings gonna go right?
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Anticipation almost always exceeds the reality of that which we anticipated.
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False humility is thinly veiled ego disguised as self confidence.
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Met someone who works at the zoo. Apparently the panda is a nasty animal.
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I think you have a lot to offer... not necessarily as a person, but as an organ donor.
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Gotta get rid of these free radicals, but first I need to figure out what they are.
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If I ever move in with a woman, she'll have to be really comfortable with unhappiness.
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Every time I see a happy couple I want to give them a polygraph.
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The Statue of Liberty really is profound, I just wish she'd lighten up a bit.
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Heard someone say children are god's gift to the world. What world are you referring to? And what's your definition of gift?
Dov Davidoff